Ten Signs You’re Entering Middle Age

1. Your butt becomes uncomfortable in wooden chairs after about half an hour, distracting you from your stiff lower back.

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2. Hangovers last three days, not one.

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3. Your children need to shave.

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4. You can’t read freeway signs until you’re directly under them, and you’d rather miss your exit than buy reading glasses.

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5. Drinking coffee after 12 noon keeps you up at night.  And when you do order a cup before noon, it’s “half caf/half decaf.”

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6. Everybody – EVERYBODY – from the cute barista at Starbuck’s who wasn’t checking you out to the receptionist at your urologist’s office, calls you “sir.”

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7. You have a urologist.

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8. You pay your parking tickets the same day you receive them, and you’re not that angry about it.

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9. You discuss mortgage rates at dinner parties, and actually have an opinion about them: fixed is better than adjustable, no question about it.

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10. Good sex and good sleep are equally important to you.

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3 thoughts on “Ten Signs You’re Entering Middle Age

  1. How depressing! At least nobody calls me sir
    ;)

    There’s a saying in Spain… you know you’ve reach to your middle years when you and your friends chat enthusiastically about the size of the prawns, instead of… ahem, chicks!

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