You are currently browsing all entries tagged with 'women'

If You’re a Japanese Woman, There’s a Good Chance You’re a Porn Star

  • December 28, 2011 12:01 am

I’ve always thought the Japanese were pretty awesome and here’s further proof of that: Apparently one Japanese woman in 200 has performed in a porn film.

Now, this number comes from a source in the Japanese porn industry and there doesn’t seem to be any real statistical data to support it, but let’s assume it’s true because, well, the world just seems better that way.

But lest you think this is a random figure, there is a logic behind it. According to this source, Japan releases 35,000 adult productions each year, which breaks down to a staggering 100 films per day. Between 2,000-3,000 new actresses make their debut every year and the industry has 150,000 experienced actresses in its ranks. There are 30 million Japanese woman between the ages of 19-55 so if one does the math…that comes out to one in 200 woman plying her wares in the porn biz.  Read more...

North Korean Soccer Team Lost to the U.S. Because They Were Struck by Lightning

  • June 29, 2011 12:01 am

To which I respond, “I hate when that happens.”

The North Korean team lost yesterday’s Women’s World Cup soccer match against the U.S. 2-0. I’ve already written about how boooooooring soccer is so I didn’t watch the game in question, but supposedly the North Korean women played quite well especially considering they have the youngest team in the tournament with an average age of only 20. So all in all, they competed admirably and lost honorably.

But since this is North Korea, the story would not be complete until you served it up with a side order of crazy.

After the match, the NK coach Kwang Min Kim told the press that the real reason his team lost was because…well, they had been struck by lightning. Here’s what he said:

 Read more...

Beautiful Women + Cabbage = Awesome Art!

  • June 16, 2011 12:01 am

Ju Duoqi is a Beijing-based artist who definitely works in an original medium…cabbage.

Five years ago, Ju started creating images of beautiful women out of the vegetable. Because cabbage has a bad habit of eventually rotting, Ju takes photographs of her completed works (which she sculpts using knives and toothpicks) and reconstructs them on her computer.

Check out some of her pieces below which sell for $2900-$4300 a pop. Art that makes you both hungry and horny…what more can you ask for?

 Read more...

I’m Glad I Have a Penis.

  • June 2, 2011 12:00 am

That’s not to say the revelation just dawned on me.  Although, to be fair, you do take things for granted when they’re around all the time, like your genitals.

Fate rolled the dice on those a long time ago and unless you’ve got a lot of money and a good doctor, that equipment’s what you’ve got for the rest of your life.  Much like the various classes in a role-playing game, each gender’s got pros and cons.

Now what qualities may be considered as positive or negative is largely a subjective matter.  Largely.

I think everyone from both genders can agree that women unequivocally got the shorter (or nonexistent) end of the stick when it comes to urination.

Generally speaking, I imagine it’s not so bad, aside from the whole “having to sit” bit.  In private residences such as one’s home, I can’t see how it would be that big a deal, especially since there wouldn’t be many people at your house – again, generally speaking.

However, as a frequenter of public water closets, I have witnessed many a time the phenomenon known as “THE LINE TO THE WOMEN’S RESTROOM.”  Read more...

I Promise I’m Sexist! I Swear on my Small Asian Penis so Just Gimme a Chance!

  • April 6, 2011 10:28 pm

So you may have heard about the accusations of anti-Asian sexism directed at the 8Asians blog by an Asian American feminist blogger named Shiuan Butler (you can read Butler’s comments here and 8Asians editor Joz’s response here). The outrage is directed specifically at two posts from 8Asians blogger Koji—the first entitled “Do Asian Women Have the Smallest Breasts?” and the second “Do Asian Women Have the Smallest Vaginas?”.

Now, in the spirit of full disclosure, I will say that I know some of the guys over at 8Asians including Joz and Koji and they’re cool and all, so I’m sure most of you are thinking I’m going to defend their right to write something sexist that really isn’t sexist unless you’re an Asian male hating feminist with no sense of humor. But that’s not what I’m here to do. In fact, the truth is I hate Joz and Koji and 8Asians right now. I loathe them even. Why? Because they’re receiving unjust criticism and misdirected anger and unwarranted bile that should rightfully be mine! That’s right, bitches, if any Asian American blogger should be accused of sexism and harassed with emails and even get a petition started against them like Butler did to 8Asians, it should be me, damnit!

I mean you’re going to accuse 8Asians of being sexist? Seriously? That’s like accusing William Hung of being musical. If the Asian American blogosphere is like high school, 8Asians is the smart kid who has his shit together and goes out of his way to consider everyone’s differing opinions. Whereas me? I’m like the kid who gets caught behind the gym smoking pot, drinking a 40, masturbating to a Kmart underwear catalogue while screaming, “I got your blue light special in my pants, girl!” and…well, I was speaking purely hypothetically there of course. Oh, and the ladies from Disgrasian would be the really hot chicks whom you pray will drop their pencil in class so they’ll have to bend…see, look at how sexist that was!

Just to drive home that point, I’m going to post random photos of half-naked Asian women throughout this blog for no reason whatsoever ‘cause that’s just the kind of guy I am.  Read more...

Slaying the Dragon Lady!

  • March 9, 2011 11:08 pm

From the title of my blog, you’d think I’m hating on Asian American women which is not the case. I’m really playing—or signifying to be specific—on the title of Professor Elaine Kim’s new documentary, Slaying the Dragon Reloaded, which will be world premiering this week at the San Francisco International Asian American Film Festival where I will also be serving on the Narrative Features jury.

I’m signifying on the title to illustrate a point about editing and misappropriation in filmmaking.

One night, when I was on Facebook, I received a message from Professor Kim asking me for permission to use an image from my film The People I’ve Slept With on the poster of her film Reloaded. I was puzzled wondering why she would want to use a picture from my film on her poster when my film didn’t have anything to do with her film. I immediately searched on-line and found the trailer for her documentary. I was surprised to find footage of Better Luck Tomorrow, which was directed by my fellow Offender Justin, in it:  Read more...

Fictional Characters I’d Totally Bang: Vulcans

  • February 15, 2011 12:01 am

I’m not a big Trekkie person or whatever you call them, but I grew up watching reruns of the original Star Trek TV series and Star Trek: The Next Generation and it was there that one of my most enduring sexual fantasies was formed: to have sex with a Vulcan. And not just regular sex, but full-on nasty, violent pon farr sex that requires hospitalization and years of therapy to completely recover. All this because of this one particular female Vulcan:

I know there had been female Vulcans on Star Trek before and, frankly, I think the aforementioned female Vulcan probably only appeared in maybe one episode of Next Generation, but that was enough. There was something about her Vulcan-ness that made her especially hot—she had that external stoicism and that lack of emotion, but you knew there was a burning, passionate fire inside just waiting to burst out. She was like a volcano (or a Vulcano—get it? Hello?) that could explode at anytime and when she did, there was nothing more I wanted than to be engulfed in her molten-y hotness. Wow…that was probably like the worst metaphor ever, but you get the point.

Now, I don’t think it’s a coincidence that my Vulcan fantasies coincided with my newfound appreciation of the hotness of Asian women. I grew up mostly around suburban white people so most of the chicks I was attracted to and dated in my youth were white. I don’t think I “discovered” Asian women until college, which is about the time my Vulcan fantasies took form (my roommates and I spent a lot of time smoking pot and watching Next Generation reruns during this period) and I haven’t looked back since.  Read more...

Why Are So Many Chinese Men Impotent? Blame The Women Of Course.

  • July 16, 2010 12:01 am

A new study released by the Chinese Medical Association this week found that 26% of Chinese guys suffer from erectile dysfunction. That means that 1 in every 4 men in China has problems getting it up. Compare that to the 18% of men in the U.S. who suffer from the same condition and one has a better idea of the extent of this problem.

And there’s more: The situation is worse for Chinese men over 40—40% of them suffer from erectile dysfunction. And because of the stigma attached to this issue and the lack of public awareness, 83% of these sufferers never seek help for their problem. This comes on the heels of a 2009 survey where China was ranked 11th out of 13 countries in overall satisfaction with their sex lives. 

So what’s the deal with these Chinese dudes? According to the study, only 7.2 % of the cases are due to physical problems. That means the majority of these men could get it up if they wanted to, but can’t because of some psychological hang-up.  Read more...

Chinky Or Not Chinky: I Think I Have ‘Yellow Fever’ Edition!

  • March 19, 2010 12:06 am

Yellow Fever:
Sexual obsession felt by a non-asian (Usually white, usually male) towards asians of the opposite gender. Symptoms of yellow fever include stalking, halfhearted attempts to learn Japanese/Mandarin/Cantonese/Korean and whacking off to Sailor Moon video’s.
And I should know.
–From Urbandictionary

The other day, an ex-Asian American girlfriend who currently lives up in San Francisco posted some photos from a Lunar New Year’s celebration she attended. She was dressed in a cheongsam that fit tightly around her still curvaceous and lovely body. The dress also had that slit that runs down the side to show off her long and silky smooth legs. And damn, if I wasn’t turned on! I haven’t thought about this woman in a long time, but the only thing that kept me from jumping on a plane to the Bay Area at that very moment was the fact that she has a husband and a kid now.

But it got me thinking about why these photos got me all hot and bothered. Like I said, she’s not someone I really think much about these days, yet there was something…well, I think I might just have to conclude that it was the whole cheongsam thing that made her look so fine. Which begs the question: Do I have yellow fever? And maybe even more pressing than that: Is it even possible for an Asian guy to have yellow fever?  Read more...