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Imagine that in some alternate universe, Disney/Pixar’s animated feature Up was made in 1965 as a live-action film starring the late, great Spencer Tracy. Check out the following awesome trailer that shows you what such a film might have looked like. And yes, everyone is here including Asian Wilderness Explorer Russell, Dug the talking dog and the floating balloon house:
It’s just about that time of the year again. Festive shades of red and green are starting to pepper the streets and amazing arrays of lights are coming to life in neighborhoods across the country. Blow-up reindeer and snowmen tower over more and more lawns on the way home.
As a southern California resident however, the signs of the holidays are pretty much restricted to those made by man. When it comes to matters of nature’s grandeur, we’re pretty much stuck with (what is to natives) blistering cold minus the awesome wonder of snow. Every time I go outside now – which isn’t often – I think about just how much more understanding I’d be of the weather if it were at least accompanied with the once-a-year abilities to make snow angels and add a scarf to my outfit without worrying about my fading masculinity.
Hope y’all had a happy thanksgiving – that is if you celebrate that kind of thing – and are ready to play catch up with YOMYOMF. This last full week of November, we explore the universal appeal of breasts pressing against our freedom of speech; the correlation between threatening times and amounts of sweet, sweet intercourse; and the exemplary human behavior on display on Black Friday.
The new trailer for the upcoming Seth Rogen-starring Green Hornet film was just released last week (see below) to mostly positive fan reaction. That plus a recent test screening of the film that went well must be welcome news for the filmmakers after the mostly bad buzz that has been dogging the production from the start.
Of course anyone who knows anything about the Green Hornet knows that the real star of the show is Asian sidekick Kato, most famously played by martial arts legend Bruce Lee in the short-lived 1960s television series. This time, Jay Chou is Kato and if the new trailer is any indication, it looks like the character will definitely have a chance to shine so we’ll see if Chou is up to the task. Check out the trailer here:
In the meantime, here are six more films (in no particular order) where the Asian “sidekick” stole the picture from right under the nose of the white protagonist:
I’ve been giving my fellow Offender Jerome a hard time for geeking out so much on Inception (no, Jerome, it’s not technically illegal to marry a movie, but it’s generally frowned upon). So I thought I’d throw him a boner bone and do an Inception-flavored post. Those of you who already spend too much time online like me has probably already seen the various Inception trailer mash-ups. Following are a few of my favs.
Oh, and I’ve challenged Jerome to write an Inception-themed post every week until the end of the year. He might have thought I was joking, but I’m totally serious and if he’s a real man, he would accept the challenge. So I guess we’ll just have to wait to see if he is or not. In the meantime, enjoy:
Up mash-up:
Men are hard. Emotionally hard. In comparison to the ladies, men have a more difficult time ejaculating tears of emotion and bearing naked their inner child. Why do men have such a hard time crying during life’s more tender moments? Why do men choose the stoic option instead of a good, wet cathartic release? Why are men so afraid to engage their emotional self, squeeze it, and allow it to ooze through their fingers and out through their orifices? Why, why, why?
Why? Because men are emotionally retarded (and being Asian only adds to the mess). It’s not that men cannot cry like the ladies or the babies. No, it’s just that they have been conditioned since birth to emulate the emotional spectrum of a stone – cold, hard, unmoving. It’s not their fault. Men are innocent victims of expectation and societal rules passed down through generations of family, religion, and porno. It is what it is but that does not make it ok…
A new year is upon us. 2010 has finally arrived. What do you have planned for the next 360 odd days? What new year’s resolutions have you made? What changes do you want to see happen? Quit smoking? Start smoking? Lose 10 pounds? Get breast implants? Perhaps, phalloplasty? Find love?
ooohhh… Love. That’s a tough one, huh? True love. Finding true love is like herding cats – frustratingly impossible yet strangely addicting. But worry not. If your new year’s resolution is to FIND TRUE LOVE IN 2010, we here at YOMYOMF can help. Single? Not for long. Married or in a committed relationship? We’ll help you out-tiger the Tiger. With our vast amounts of twisted knowledge honed from years of abuse and torture by the cruel whip of Hollywood, we here at YOMYOMF have created a potent (and patented) love technology that we have termed, “Seduction Through Cinema©“. Follow these simple steps in the exact orders laid out and you will be well on your way to the alter (and one step closer to divorce). Please use and share this technology with those you love. But as with fire, uranium, or a black mamba, please handle with the utmost respect and humility. With great power comes great responsibility…
The Holiday season is a time of reflection and as a pop culture gadfly-consumer-whore, it’s a great time to think about the best in pop culture, 2009. Countless entertainment outlets are entrusting cultural experts on their “Top 10″ lists for film, TV, videogames, books, etc., but I’m not going to bore you with all that rigamarole. Instead, I’m going to limit my choice to just one per category (yeah, right): Best Comic; Best Non-Fiction & Fiction Books; Best Song; Best Documentary; Best Feature; Best TV Show.
Overall, 2009 was a good year for entertainment, with Television really taking the cake on truly exciting fare coming out of Hollywood nowadays.
Best Comic: X-MEN MAGNETO TESTAMENT
But, let’s start with comics, shall we? Now, I didn’t read many comics this year (there are just too many titles coming out and it gets expensive). But, the mini-series that really got to me was X-MEN: MAGNETO TESTAMENT, a 5-issue miniseries which you can now buy as a graphic novel trade publication. Written by Greg Pak, he himself a filmmaker turned Marvel Comics mastermind, he had the cajones to retell the story of young Magneto, by weaving in the Holocaust. On the contrary, Pak wrote a humanistic tale full of authentic and dark experiences that shaped the Magneto that we know today. It’s an origin story, much like Frank Miller’s seminal Batman: Year One but takes it one step further in crafting a storyline that doesn’t deal with men in tights and super powers.
I’m back to offer more advice to all my Asian American brothas looking to get laid by some hot white chick but having no luck. The reality is–white people can’t tell us apart anyway so why not use this fact to your advantage? Pretend to be some other more famous Asian dude. Here are some suggestions for brothas you can pass for in order to ensure you don’t spend another Saturday night home alone spanking your monkey king:
THE CHINESE DUDE WHO STEPPED IN FRONT OF THE TANKS AT TIANANMEN
