Moviegoing, for me, is the closest thing I’ve got to ceremony in my life. In my habits here, I am very predictable.
I always show up about thirty minutes before showtime – twenty at the latest – to make sure I get a seat in the middle of the middle of the theater, generally the aural sweet spot of the space.
I buy a box of Red Vines to get through over the course of the movie.
And, of course, I store the ticket stub in my wallet to add to my bulging collection in there.
If filmmaking is a religion, the movie theater is my church and so with it comes, fittingly, certain expectations of conduct.
Let’s start with the obvious thing to bitch about: talking. So many people are in agreement with this that most, if not all, theaters have a sort of PSA about it prior to the movie starting. You know the one I’m talking about.
It’s the one with the cheesy graphics asking you politely to “refrain from talking.” Haha – everyone knows you don’t get anything by asking politely.
Anyway, yeah – no shit. Moviegoers aren’t spending two hours in the dark to hear you talk; there are more beautiful and important people up on screen to pay attention to. And if s/he is so important to you, why did you bring your baby to the theater when s/he’s probably scared of the dark?
Fellow blogger 
