Do You Know Yubiwaza?

And what is Yubiwaza I hear you asking yourself over the unsecure internets? Why, it’s the “amazingly easy art of self-defense that turns just one finger or your hands into a potent weapon of defense – without any bodily contact”. And as you can see from this vintage ad, it’s an incredible martial art that you can master at home starting in just 2 hours:

Boys!-Men!-I'll-Help-You-Ma

All this for only $1.98! This sounds so amazing, I wonder why it never took off unless there’s a thriving underground sub-culture of practicing Yubiwaza enthusiasts.

The Short List: REQUIEM FOR ROMANCE

As part of the YOMYOMF Network series, The Short List, where we present short films here on the YOMYOMF blog, we’ve reached out to the filmmakers with 5 Questions to see what’s up since the production of their short film. It’s a way for them to revisit their film and get an update on their next projects. You can view all The Short List films here.

This week, we present Montreal-based Jonathan Ng’s award-winning REQUIEM FOR ROMANCE. He graciously answered our quick questionnaire in-between development meetings for his next project.

Go Into Battle Hello Kitty Style

So for all your martial arts and Hello Kitty enthusiasts who have bemoaned the lack of opportunities to bring your two loves together, I give you this—

ku-xlarge

It’s the Hello Kitty bogu or “kendo armour.”

And why would you need to adorn your battle armour with images of a cute cartoon cat while you beat on your opponent with a stick? Hell if I know, but considering we’ve seen the famous Japanese cat on everything from this:

The Epic Split by Jean Claude Van Damme

I know I am late to the game on this amazing Volvo commercial starring ’80s action star Jean Claude Van Damme (aka JCVD), showcasing the car company’s precision power steering technology. How do they sell it? Well, JCVD being all zen, wedged between two semi-trucks, driving in reverse and both vehicles slowly moving apart from one another so that Van Damme can showcase his epic leg split, balanced between the two trucks as they continue onward backward on the most epic runway ever (hey, is this the same runway from the ending of FAST SIX?).

So That’s What ‘Yellow Face’ is Really About

This past summer, the YOMYOMF Network presented the first-ever YouTube adaptation of a play—our fellow Offender David Henry Hwang’s award-winning Yellow Face. All this time, we thought the plot revolved around an Asian American playwright named DHH who mistakenly casts a Caucasian actor as an Asian character in his play and tries to cover it up, but according to this streaming site, boy, were we ever wrong!

Click on image to enlarge

Click on image to enlarge

Yes, according to the description on this site, the story is apparently really about this:

A Chinese-American cop, skilled in martial arts, battles the most powerful criminal gang in San Francisco that is responsible for the death of his partner.

Around The Horn: Oh my knees! Oh my back! Oh my (insert here)!!

We deserve to wear outfits like this on a regular basis!

I like to think of us humans as superheroes. We can do ANYTHING!!! (Dum da da DAA!)

But I am plagued with the joy of motion sickness. I throw up and have migraines at the drop of a single ocean wave. I have failed miserably at surfing, sailing, deep sea fishing, rollercoaster-ing, merry-go-rounding, swinging, trapezing, and passenger seat riding up winding mountain roads. I am reduced to a blob of unresponsiveness, like a blacked-out pledge at a frat party.

I Love Me Some Backhanded Compliments.

I have spoken at length before about how to not compliment someone.  Well this time, I wasn’t in any danger of being violated, but it was still startlingly bizarre and relentless.  Actually, it might be so bizarre because of how relentless it was.

So, flashback to Saturday:

I’m with my family, celebrating a cousin’s birthday and, of course, watching the Pacquiao victory.  Appropriately enough, this place was chockful of my cousin’s friends, many, if not all, of which I only see once a year.

Good folks, they’re all good folks.  One of the guys kept getting super close to me, trying to get me drunk and asserting that he wasn’t gay — but there’s one of those at every party, am I right?

It has to be said, however, that one of the people there gave me one of the most blatant backhanded compliments I’ve ever heard and – let’s face it – I’ve heard more than my share.  And if I didn’t hear it the first time – which I did, loud and clear – he repeated it repeatedly, just in case.

Howard The Duck: The Master of Quack Fu!

This Saturday, September 25 is National Comic Book Day so in honor of the holiday, throughout the week, I’ll be looking back at some “classic” comics that relate to Asian and/or Asian American subject matter. 

If most people know about Howard the Duck at all, it’s probably from the 1986 George Lucas-produced movie, which starred a short man in a duck suit and was hailed as one of Hollywood’s biggest bombs. However, the fast-talking, cigar-chomping, “trapped in a world he never made” duck first started life as a Marvel comics character in 1973 courtesy of creators Steve Gerber and Val Mayerik before getting his own title in 1976.

Unlike the generic special effects-heavy film version, Gerber brought a satiric sensibility to the original comic. Whether running for President or contemplating suicide, Gerber used his fowl creation to comment on the social issues of the day. Which brings us to Howard The Duck issue #3 (dated May 1976) when our titular character becomes The Master of Quack Fu!

Asian Conan Vs. Asian Leno

Die-hard Conan O’Brien fans staged an “I’m With Coco” rally yesterday in front of Universal Studios despite the pounding rain. There were a number of surprises including an appearance by the masturbating bear and Conan himself (see story here). And this street fight between Asian Conan and Asian Jay: