A lot of people are still feeling the economic pinch. The unemployment figures are way up and it remains tough all around. The last thing anyone needs is the pressure of another holiday created by greedy corporate capitalists designed to guilt you into spending money you don’t have to buy things you don’t necessarily need. But alas, this Sunday is Valentine’s Day so you’re shit out of luck. And unlike in Asia where women buy men presents for Valentine’s, in the U.S. the pressure is on the guys to come through with gifts and goodies for their women. Yeah, it’s ass backwards here, tell me about it.
So for all of you guys going through financial difficulties who are now also stressing out because your significant other is expecting something “special” (i.e. expensive) for Valentine’s, I’m here to help. You can surf the net and find plenty of tips on how to do Valentine’s on a budget (see here and here for examples), but come on—taking your woman shopping at a 99 cent store or for a free romantic walk on the beach only reinforces the fact that you’re cheap and/or broke. That won’t fly. Especially if you’re with an Asian chick. And if she’s Korean, forget about it! In that case, Valentine’s Day may just as well be called “My boyfriend is required to buy me a new Prada purse and diamond necklace or I won’t have sex with him for six months” Day.
Some parents are shocked and outraged that a Stamford-based company—GIANTmicrobes—is selling 
