Nine 2013 Things That Later Will Seem Sooooo 2013.

guest_offendersDOMINIC
Dominic Mah is a writer of screenplays, rock musicals, comics/graphic novels, and the kind of status updates that help you lose weight while having fun. He is often found in karaoke bars, being @dommah.

2013sucked

The years pass. The flip phone you coveted in 2005 to replace your clunky chocolate bar is now atrociously old, unapp-able, irrelevant. At the time, it was the best electronic device ever. But “ever” turned out to be a real long time. Here I propose 10 phenomena and pop-culture moments that for better and worse will be inextricably locked to this time, and in the future when you think on them, whether it is with fondness, disdain, or just a kind of wizened adult knowing, you will go, “Dude, that was soooo 2013.”

1. Having thoughts longer than 140 characters.
This has been on the way out for a while, but after 2013, all thoughts longer than a tweet will be considered totally quaint, #Ifigure. People will instinctively boil their ideas down to #hashtaggable size, to avoid the shame of having unleashed, like, a tome of blah blah blah @ their @friends and @followers. For example, this whole argument used to be composed of much longer sentences, with citations and evidence to extensively support my thesis. But then I got the point already. #Movingon #PoeticClarity

Chinky or Not Chinky: Katy Perry Goes Geisha at the AMAs

So Katy Perry went full geisha during her performance of “Unconditionally” which opened tonight’s American Music Awards.

katy-perry-ama-2013-650

As far as I can tell, there’s nothing “Japanese-y” about the song (well, unless loving someone unconditionally=me luv you long time), but that’s no reason not to stage an elaborate number complete with a bonsai garden set, geisha-inspired moves, Japanese fans, cherry blossoms and even geisha Katy Perry spontaneously combusting in a fireball at the climax because, damnit, that’s what geishas do! Only thing missing is a pack of Harajuku girls following Perry around (or any real Japanese people as far as I can tell).

SAF Seeking… Freedom from the ‘W’ Word

I freakin’ hate you Cinderella.

Dear God,

I know I’m an ant in your gigantic galactic ant farm. I know you’re dealing with people no longer working at home, child prostitution in Bangladesh, and rumors of Jimmy Fallon replacing Jay Leno (Bring back CONAN, NBC you suck!)… but if you could just wave your magic wand over the fuckin’ ‘wedding’ hanging over my head, would you just please:

1. Please make my soon-to-be-in-laws stop hounding me about how my wedding done outside of the Catholic church is an abomination of the sanctity of marriage

2. Please make my own parents stop hounding me about how my wedding done outside of the Catholic church is an abomination of the sanctity of marriage

organically charming

Throwing known, Hollywood actors into home-made YouTube videos is a tough thing to do.  Much of the time they come off as a bit too “selly”, “pluggy”, or just trying too hard to be natural and organic (hence not natural or organic at all).  Here’s one that’s just charming and fun and put a smile on my face.  Hope it puts a smile on yours.  Have a great weekend!  : )

STUCK IN MY BRAIN: “Healing Incantation” from Tangled.

I rewatched Tangled recently and while there are a lot of imminently singable songs, one in particular found itself lodged in my obsessive brain.

As someone who’s had his fair share of pop songs lodged in his memory, this is actually a merciful move on Fate’s part in more ways than one.

Firstly, Tangled is a splendid film with lots of great characters and moments – two things that you can mention to concisely and generically praise any movie.

So the fact that the song evokes the memory of something pleasant and substantial makes its constant repetition in my mind’s ear more bearable.

What I Learned on YOMYOMF This Week – October 24 – 30, 2010

HAPPY HALLOWEEN, FOLKS!  It’s that time of the year when people find a way to make every character in your childhood into something sexy, confirming whatever weird fetishes you may possesses regarding the Thundercats (although god damn, Lion-O – have you seen his thighs?).

And that’s as good a segue as any other into what many academic journals have already called “THE BEST USE OF LOOPING EVER, BRB:”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nx2BJ-AdOaI

I wanted to use the .gif, but it wouldn’t work.  It was probably too big – that’s what she said – so just turn off the volume and wonder just where that Elmo shirt is now.

If any of you are wondering, my Halloween costume will be/is Arthur from Inception (minus the PASIV suitcase just because it is so expensive) with a side of Guy Fawkes just because I doubt anyone will be able to tell I am Arthur until I start performing the introduction of the film by myself.

don't worry, ladies - you'll all have a turn

Right about now I am probably seeing just how gaga the women will be over a man who can dream a little bigger.  While they are undoubtedly crawling all over me, check out the interview I did with Chris Lee, executive producer of such films as Superman Returns and Valkyrie, over at the Interpretations site before reading on.

This week, YOMYOMF delved into getting your ass kicked by your younger self; the adventures of the murderous Great Pumpkin; and the diaries of Vlad Tepes.  If you haven’t wet your pants in excitement yet, you may want to check your bladder.  And if you have, what the hell is wrong with you?  GET THE HELL OUT.

What I Learned on YOMYOMF This Week – May 16-22, 2010

Hello again, Reader! I capitalized the ‘r’ in ‘reader’ because I think you’re that special. Yes, that’s right, you are special and I’m not using the word ‘special’ as a euphemism. I just want to say it’s been a pleasure writing for y’all the past six weeks and I hope it will still be a pleasure in the coming weeks.

Picture of me not being a dick.

This week, YOMYOMF provides some pointers for blending in with Whitey; finding overlooked erotica; and making shit into energy.

So, all in all, just another week: