The Tiger is quiet. Tis been 5 days since the Thanksgiving mystery crash and still no peep from the golf champion’s lair.
Being the star of a multi billion dollar brand, he has the right to do whatever he wants. And though Tiger’s corporate sponsors are “standing by their man”, there is no doubt that these multinationals, who have banked & invested hundreds of millions into the Tiger Brand Image, are secretly crapping their pants if indeed Tiger could not keep his tiger in his pants. Sometimes, silence is not golden.
So just in case things at Camp Tiger take a serious turn for the worse, here are a few minor adjustments that will allow the Tiger Brand to survive and prosper…
Nike: Just Do It. Just don’t get caught.
Gatorade: It’s In You…Tiger, that is.
American Express: Your brain. Don’t Leave Home Without It.
Gillette: The Best A Man Can Get. until you find someone hotter than your wife.
Buick: Nothing Drives Quite Like A Buick…except for that stripper at Deja Vu
General Mills: Grow Up Strong, not stupid
Tag Heuer: Success. It’s a Mind Game. just make sure you sign a prenup
General Motors: Built To Last rong time
Titleist: The #1 Ball In Golf always finds it’s hole
please feel free to modify or add to. Tiger needs us…
