You are currently browsing all entries tagged with 'cat'

SAF Seeking… Cat Love

  • March 19, 2012 12:48 pm

Ah LOVE!

Oh the glories of sleeping next to the man I love! Nookie at night, nookie by day, nookie on call! At night we fall asleep while staring deeply into each other’s eyes and sharing deep pillow talk: “You’re so beautiful.” “No, you’re beautiful!” “You smell good.” YOU smell good!” In the morning, I am greeted by butterfly kisses, tickles, and a morning cup of tea brought cheerfully to my still-crusty-morning-eyes. “You’re so beautiful.” “No, YOU’RE beautiful!!” “You’re so cute when you wake up.” “No, YOU’RE cute…”

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Giggles! Laughing! Intertwined tanned and impossibly smoothly shaved limbs tangled in Downy-scented freshly-washed and softly-pastelled 1500 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets! Hardwood floors! Skylights! It’s like a commercial for lotion. Everything is PURRRRFECT!

Save the Pussies at These Japanese Cafes

  • March 13, 2012 9:33 pm

I previously blogged about Japan’s cat cafes—which are literally businesses where people can go to hang out and play with cats. But now, due to a new law set to go into effect in June, those cat cafes may be in danger of closing.

The new changes to Japan’s Animal Protection Law are meant to limit “the public display of cats and dogs” in 24-hour pet stores where the animals are often kept in small cages under bright lights that are never turned off. But these changes may also severely restrict the hours of operation of the cat cafes, thus placing cat lovers in a misfortunate position and denying them the opportunity to spend time with their feline friends. So with that in mind, I present the following letter, written from my heart, asking the Japanese government to exempt cat cafes from this new law:

The Dead and the Beloved

  • January 4, 2012 12:05 am

Mao I before passing

In a cozy loft just south of Market Street shared by my friend M and his husband D, we were all having glasses of sake and beer around the table as the recent addition of the family, Mao II, jumped on the tabletop. M grabbed Mao II and gently combed his hair with his fingers. The black cat purred.

“Do you want to see Mao I?” asked D.

“What do you mean?” I asked. “Mao I… is dead.”

“Show him,” said M.

D ran upstairs and returned unfolding a cat skin complete with its claws and head preserved. I almost fell off my chair.

This cat is an asshole

  • August 31, 2011 12:31 pm

Bullying is a big problem in America. It’s so bad that it even affects domesticated cats.

Bully Cat Stuffs Cat In Box – Watch more Funny Videos
It gets better, white cat. I guess today is viral video day on YOMYOMF.

Oh, the Horror!

  • June 22, 2011 12:05 am

PRINCE

Prince Gomolvilas is a Thai American playwright and performer, who co-stars in JUKEBOX STORIES—a storytelling, song-singing, bingo-playing, theatrical extravaganza—that will be performed on June 24 and 26 as part of the National Asian American Theater Festival in L.A. He also wrote the stage adaptation of the Scott Heim novel, MYSTERIOUS SKIN, which launched East West Players’ 2010-11 season, and he runs BAMBOO NATION, an arts and entertainment blog. He recently started taking Muay Thai lessons, so he is confident that he can kick your ass. (If you’re six years old.)

During the summer of 2003, I was taking a stroll through Old Town Pasadena, a quaint neighborhood that happens to have a touch of street cred because of the porn store that’s crammed between the upscale restaurants and clothing boutiques. I passed by the now-gone United Artists movie theater and saw a poster for a foreign horror flick called The Eye (2002). I remembered reading somewhere that the filmmakers, identical twins Danny & Oxide Pang, were born in Hong Kong but frequently worked in Thailand. This didn’t quite make them Siamese twins (ha!), but since they were somewhat connected to “my people” I decided to saunter into the cinema for a fun and delightful afternoon matinee.

The movie scared the living shit out of me.

A blind woman receives a cornea transplant, but, along with her new vision, she is also able to see dead people. Sure, the seeing dead people thing has been done to death, but the Pang Brothers are clever visual stylists who expertly alternate between quick genuine “jump” moments and unbearably long scenes of utter dread.

More Proof the Chinese are Horny & Love to Fuck

  • May 4, 2011 12:01 am

Just a couple of weeks ago I reported that a Chinese farmer had discovered that one of his sheep had given birth to what appeared to be a cross between a sheep and a dog raising the possibility of some cross species hanky panky. Now comes news that a cat in China’s Jiangsu Province may have given birth to a…puppy.

Zhou Yun, the owner of the cat, also has a dog in her household and has said the dog and cat are friendly and even sleep together. So when she noticed that her cat seemed to have given birth to two kittens and what appears to be a puppy, she could only come to one conclusion: “Quite possibly the ‘kitty’ is a mixed child.”

To which I can only say…what the fuck is going on in China?!

Sheep having sex with dogs and dogs having sex with cats? China’s already the most populated country in the world so we know they really like to fuck. But obviously that sexual hunger also extends to the nation’s animal population—a population that clearly isn’t content to simply breed within its own circle.

(not so) Small Talk

  • April 15, 2011 4:45 am

In dog parks, humans are furniture.  We are wallpaper.  Our only role is to pick up our four legged friend’s shit.  Visiting aliens would assume that the barking flea bags are our leaders, and that we bipeds are just their hairless caretakers.

In dog parks you never ask the name of a fellow dog owner.  You ask after the dog’s name.  Standard ice breaking questions go like this:

What’s your dog’s name?

What kind of dog is it?

How old is he?  She?

Oh, he’s a boy?  Cute, cute, cute (no matter how ugly).

And that’s it.  But a few weeks ago something a little different happened.

Animal Lover

  • December 15, 2010 12:02 am

I am an animal lover. I have been an animal lover since I was a child. I’m trying to become a vegetarian or possibly vegan to encourage humane treatment for animals, but then I’m still wondering why I shouldn’t eat a piece of steak or chicken when I really want to.

No, I don’t eat dogs, but I know many Chinese do in China. I seem to feel okay about it and won’t start a mission to stop them from eating dogs or other animals. In fact, cats are also a delicacy in China. The Chinese eat everything.

As you know, basic human rights are not guaranteed in China. Remember what happened at Tiananmen Square in 1989? It was only 21 years ago when military tanks rolled over civilian students. I could still vividly remember the protests that happened when I returned to Hong Kong that summer. So when “basic human rights” are really culturally defined, could we expect to have basic animal rights?

What I Learned on YOMYOMF This Week – May 30 – June 5, 2010

  • June 5, 2010 10:12 pm

You gentle folk know the drill by now.  I read YOMYOMF.  I make snarky remarks.  You are disgusted and repulsed by my sense of humor.  You wonder what kind of person could possibly think like that.  I keep up my bizarre persona.  I stay cooped up in my room, crying, keeping my defense mechanism of weird sarcasm and non-sequiturs up, lamenting my permanent inability to relate to others.

YOUR MOM.

This first week of June, YOMYOMF mourns fallen actors, big and small; tackles the various lesbians who look like Justin Bieber (figuratively); and explores the matter of animal genitals.  Again.

My parents read this.

Away we go!

Beautiful Fat Cat

  • April 16, 2010 8:59 pm

Feeling lazy?

Don’t feel bad.  You probably exercise more than this guy.  Or the cat.

A lazy Friday requires a photo of a fat, fat cat.

The cat and the bat

  • April 15, 2010 7:53 pm

Fellow offender Iris’ Youtube Cats post reminded me of this video.

As you can see, cats aren’t always just cute. They are predators after all.
I’d give up a year of my life in exchange for that kind of hops.

Paul Newman’s Tuna Casserole

  • January 31, 2010 10:56 am

Phil’s blog reminded me of a story that A.C. Lyles told at a function I attended once.  A. C. Lyles is a producer and unofficial ambassador for Paramount Studios.  He is 91 and sharp as a tack.  Having been in the business for 78 years, he has a lot of stories to tell.  One of them was about Paul Newman’s tuna casserole.  It went something along the lines of this: