My family was not particularly religious growing up, but what my mother lacked in religion, she made up for in superstitious beliefs. Not only did we have to incorporate Japanese superstitions, but American ones as well. So besides the whole 7-years-bad-luck broken mirror thing, I also couldn’t wear a new pair of shoes in the house or bunch things in four (the pronunciation for four “shi” is the same as the word for death, but I have no idea where the shoes bit came from.)
Some of the superstitions are common across different Asian cultures. For instance, sticking chopsticks upright in a rice bowl is a no-no, since that is the way rice is offered to the dead. I remember being at a function once where the dinner was supposed to be an “Asian” theme, but clearly was not decorated by an Asian because the center display at all the tables was a bowl of rice with chopsticks sticking straight out of it. There was a collective gasp as those of us who were Asian approached our tables. I quietly removed the chopsticks from my table display and I saw others do the same.
Some of my mother’s superstitions were outright nutty and I wondered if she wasn’t just making these things up to drive us crazy. No whistling at night because it would attract burglars. Only old people pose in the middle of photos because the center person would die first. We couldn’t say “poor cat” to a dead cat because its soul would haunt you. A gathering of crows meant death was near. If something falls in the house, there will be a death of someone you know. Is it just me or are a lot of superstitions centered around death?
I remember I was with my mother once, just the two of us in the house, when there was a loud “bang” from a broom falling to the floor and my mom blurted out, “Someone died!” I think she even made some calls to make sure everybody we knew was still alive. I waited fearfully, wondering who it would be, but nobody died, or at least nobody we cared about because the expected news of death never arrived. In fact, in my experience, none of these superstitions ever panned out. And yet, to this day, I put my new shoes on outside the house and buy bananas in bunches of threes or fives but never in fours. I am completely brainwashed.
The one superstition I might actually admit to having come true was a Hawaiian one. In Hawaii, it is a commonly known taboo to pick up a piece of lava rock as a souvenir. Bad luck will beset those who do not heed the warnings. In fact, there is a whole website full of stories of returned rocks. My visiting grandmother was one of those unlucky tourists. She came with us on a vacation to the Big Island, and was forewarned, but did it anyway. Right after that, my sister and I, who were toddlers at the time, both got sick (probably a case of bad food rather than Pele’s curse) and my grandmother got locked out of her hotel room while my parents were gone. Since she couldn’t speak a word of English, it was a harrowing experience for her. After that, she insisted we go back to the place where we picked up the rock so that she could dump it.
Another Hawaiian superstition is that if you take pork on the Pali Highway at night, your car will stop or break down. I don’t know of anyone who has been brave enough to try that one yet.
What were some of your superstitions growing up? If you or someone you know has taken pork on Pali Highway, I’d love to hear what happened.








I grew up in a mostly non-superstitious family, with my dad being an engineer and my mom being a commerce grad (and later, a computer programmer). It’s funny; they didn’t even learn that eight was lucky until moving to Canada (and meeting lots of superstitious Cantonese folk
).
I had no idea about the rice/chopsticks thing until I went on a three-week tour of Taiwan (where I was born) with a bunch of North American/ European Chinese kids. I would stick my chopsticks into my rice when I got up to go to the washroom, just so they wouldn’t roll around, and every time I came back they’d be lying on the bowl instead. The first couple times it probably only registered unconsciously, but it kept happening and eventually I asked my friends why the hell they kept moving my chopsticks and learned of the taboo. I then found an empty table where the kids had already finished eating and stuck a pair of chopsticks into a leftover bowl of rice to see how long my friends could take having it there. Probably not even a minute passed before someone had to take the chopsticks down. Funny stuff!
i can’t write my name in red without feeling like i’m playing a cosmic game of russian roullette.
also, especially as a kid, i had the bad habit of shaking my leg, which is supposed to shake all my luck away with it. damn that shaky leg!
About the chopsticks in rice thing….I was told that it mimicked how incense sticks are used in offerings…..but it is so “convenient” to place them that way sometimes.
Here are some more:
= Never give a “bag-like” gift without putting at least a small amount of money inside. Reason: the words “empty bag” have a negative connotation.
= Never give a “clock” as a gift. Reason: the word sounds the same as the word for death.
= Never give a “book” as a gift. Reason: the word sounds the same as the word for death.
= Never place one of those huge decorative fans on a wall as a decorative item. Reason: I forget exactly, but it has something to do with mis-fortune in romantic affairs, or something like that.
= Various rules for the placement of mirrors in the house. Reason: general bad luck & feng-shui.
= Various rules for the placement of “water” (fountains, aquariums, whatever). Reason: general good luck & feng-shui.
There are probably more, but that’s what I can recall off-hand…
Nope. I’m not superstitious much. But I think many of our parents had the same teachers, or something. :-/
ooops….errata….I was “cutting-&-pasting” and forgot to edit something…
“book” is because it sounds like “LOSE”.
I learned this one when my dance class took a trip to Disneyworld. I bought a green hat with Mickey Mouse on it as a souvenir for my grandfather. Upon returning home and showing it to my parents, they laughed at me and forbid me from giving it to him. Apparently “to wear a green hat” means that a man’s wife is cheating on him. I still have the hat in my closet… Maybe someday I’ll give it to a guy whose wife is unfaithful and share an inside joke with myself.
passing stuff at dinner from chopstick to chopstick.
apparently that’s what’s done at burial sites to ceremoniously transfer the bones of your dead.
that’s why i only eat with my hands at chinese banquets.
Disney consulted a Feng Shui master in planning and building Hong Kong Disneyland. In HK, real estate investors and architects usually seek advice from Feng Shui masters before and during a new construction project.
Giving scissors or knives away as gifts is a big no no as it implies cutting off a friendship.
Avoiding anything with the number ’4′ as the word phonetically sounds like ‘death’ though if you have ’54′ it’s okay as it sounds like the phrase ‘no death’ but ’14′ is bad as it means ‘die at once’.
There is a custom to eat a small piece of candy at funerals as I believe it symbolizes sweetness to replace the bitterness of death.
White paper lanterns are a no no as they were put out to let the community know that someone has died. But, I still love and will continue to use my Noguchi paper lamp…
There’s symbolic food like suckling pig at a wedding which symbolizes virginity, sweet rice ball soup which represents fertility, and egg noodles which means longevity. If only I knew what to eat for world peace and harmony (tofu?)…
Ducks represent fidelity(wedding) , tangerines and oranges = luck(Chinese new year), fish = prosperity (Chinese new year).
1.) I never showcase a fertility doll in my home unless I want to get pregnant immediately.
http://www.rebirth.co.za/doll/fertility_doll_ashanti.htm
2.) When you smell roses and you’re not near any, that means someone has died.
3.) Never eat the last bite of food on the family style dinner plates or you will grow up to be an old maid.
4.) Never give shoes as a gift because it’s saying that the receiving person is too poor to have good shoes.
5.) If a lightpole/signpost/tree gets between you and a friend while you’re walking, you need to run around the tree/signpost/lightpole saying, “Bread and butter!” or else your friendship will be cut.
6.) Never say MacBeth in a theatre.
7.) Always kiss your hand and then place the kiss on the fuselage of the plane before you go in, and your flight will be safe.
hey iris, i love this post! hawaii is definitely the superstition capital of the world. here’s some i’ve learned growing up there:
1. Don’t whistle at night or near a graveyard. It attracts spirits.
2. Every new house, business, or establishment must be blessed by a kahuna or Hawaiian priest, and a priest or holy person from your own ethnic background (for double measure).
3. The Japanese pidgin word BACHI was pretty prevalent, meaning bad karma or “What goes around, comes around”
4. If you see an old woman in white on the side of the road, you have to pick her up and give her a ride to her desired destination. It’s Madame Pele (the Volcano Goddess).
5. This happens apparently in the mountains/hiking trails around Oahu: If you hear Hawaiian chants and marching, you have to strip off all your clothes, lay on the ground with your face down and don’t look up. It’s the infamous “Night Marchers” or ancient Hawaiian warriors who are on an endless march. If you make eye contact, they will take your soul.
6. Don’t sweep your house during New Years or you will sweep all the good luck away.
7. Never situate your bed, here your feet face the bedroom door. Spirits will snatch you away.
This is just the tip of the iceberg…
My buddy got his hair cut on his birthday and his mom got pissed; apparently it cuts years off your life. Also, he had to have the bedroom of his condo renovated so that he wouldn’t have mirrored closet doors facing the foot of his bed. CRAZY.
OK, after reading some of your superstitions, I realize my family wasn’t that nutty in comparison. Thanks for sharing!
Beverly, your #5 sounds like something an older kid would tell a younger kid as a prank. Same with your #5, Anderson. I wonder if that’s how some of these superstitions get started.
1) Sharing a pear with someone means you’ll stop being friends or family. Splitting a pear “fun lay” sounds like separation in Cantonese.
2) White clothes is clothing for mourning. My grandpa wore white tennis shoes to my brother’s wedding (I think on purpose to piss my mom off) my parents nearly fainted. That was 12 yrs ago and they’re still mad.
This is so ingrained in my mind, I had to fight the compulsion to hide under the table while wearing the white wedding gown during my own wedding.
3) Never get an used mirror, spirits travel with mirrors.
4) Open umbrellas are spirit mediums. Never leave one open indoors.
5) Don’t touch or eat any ceremonial offering food before the ceremony is over. Don’t diss the spirits.
6) OMG, I totally snatch the red crayon away if I catch my kids signing their names with it!
7) Pretend you don’t notice a pregnancy, even if the mama is big as a whale. Talking about an unborn baby jinx the baby’s survival rate. No acknowledgment until after the Full Month Ceremony.
9) Don’t try to call hiking “h-un san” walk mountain/ mountain walking. Walking a mountain is taking the journey to visit your ancestor’s graves.
10) Always take a couple of kids to check out a house before you commit to buying it. If the kids seem uncomfortable there, there are probably lingering evil spirits.
@Iris (and Anderson):
I’m also from Hawaii, and was taught that it’s not just lava rocks – it’s anything that comes from a volcano, including volcanic glass and black sand. When our 4th grade class went to the Big Island, our teachers warned us not to take ANYTHING from the volcanoes (and I went to Iolani at the time)
[...] tables. Being born and bred in Hawaii, I know of the ramifications of toying with many of Hawaii’s superstitions, and I dare not temp the fates like Greg Brady and the cursed Tiki statue. Check out the TV show [...]