Yes, loyal readers, today is National Hamburger Day a.k.a. one of the most awesome holidays ever created. And considering that Americans consume 14 billion hamburgers a year, I don’t think I’m alone in thinking this is an awesome holiday. Since it would be unpatriotic not to recognize this occasion, I have vowed to do so by eating as many hamburgers for lunch as possible. I would extend this vow through dinner but I already have plans for all-you-can-eat Korean bbq so I don’t want to look like a pig.

So what I think I’ll do is a walking burger lunch tour through my hood (which is Los Feliz and Silver Lake). I figure this way I’ll get some exercise and burn off some of the calories I’ll be consuming so it’s a win-win. Anyway, here’s the plan:

Will start off at The Fix in Silver Lake. Now, this place is fairly new to the neighborhood and I’ve only recently discovered it (thanks to Jon at Intertrend). The burgers are great, but what makes this place even better is that it’s right across the street from Tomato Pie Pizza, one of the best pizzas in L.A. (thanks to Offender Elaine for that intro). I’m not saying I’ve ever done this, but you could technically eat a burger and onion rings at The Fix, then walk across the street and top off your meal with a slice of pizza or two or, hell, even a regular large pizza with all the toppings at Tomato Pie. Again, I’m not saying I’ve ever done that, but…uh…fuck you, don’t judge me! Anyway, tomorrow, I’ll just stick with this:

Next, I’ll trek over the hill to the Ye Rustic Inn, which is one of my local bars (hey, maybe I’ll run into farm girl there). I have yet to actually have a burger there, but I’ve been told they’re one of the best in town so figure Hamburger Day is as good a day as any to check it out. Plus, they have beer and scotch. And that’s always a good thing. I couldn’t find a photo of the Rustic Inn burger but here’s their patty melt, which I hear is also good:

Then, it’s a few blocks south down to Hollywood Blvd. and Umami Burger, which I’ve written about before so let me just leave you with this:

I should have time for one final stop after this. I figure I’ll pay some love to one of the major chains–why the hell not? I could get a Big Mac at McDonald’s or a Whopper at Burger King (unfortunately no In-N-Out or Tommy’s within walking distance), but I think it’ll have to be the Fatburger, just a block down from Umami. Why Fatburger? Well, anyplace that still has the balls to call themselves Fatburger in this day and age is worthy of support. But where else can you also get a burger with double meat, double egg, double bacon and chili (and they’ll probably throw in some hot dog wieners on top of all that too if you want)? Check that shit out:

Like I said, it’ll probably need to end there as I need to rest before all-you-can-eat Korean bbq. Of course, it would be much easier and I wouldn’t have to do so much walking if someone would just serve this:

Happy Hamburger Day!