It’s the night before your test and you haven’t studied for shit. The class textbook is perfectly capable of knocking out a small person if swung at their head. And exhaustion is creeping through every inch of your bones.
“Fuck yeah, naps!” That’s what you’re thinking. In fact, that’s your only feasible option. How will you make it through the rest of the night, through what is sure to be a most arduous cram session, without just a bit of rest?
So you let yourself lie down on your bed for a second. Only a second. Let your head hit the soft, soft pillow. Actually, you don’t even get under the blankets. That’s sure to keep you from going to sleep outright. Just a nap here, folks. In and out of dreamland, real quick.
And you are! Five minutes of napping and you snap back to the rest of the waking. The urgency of your task springs you back to reality without an alarm and you slink back to your desk and start reading.
“Friggin’ Descartes. When am I ever gonna need to learn this proof? This isn’t what I thought philosophy would be like at all.” And you figured there would be more pot involved. That’s disappointing.
Yet you haven’t even been awake again for ten minutes when that wave of weariness washes over you again, pulling you ever closer to the depths of sleep.
You try to keep your eyes open. You war with yourself to keep your mind sharp.
No. You start to fall in and out of consciousness in your spinning office chair and you’ve been reading the same paragraph for the last seven minutes because you’ve been falling asleep sporadically and quite temporarily in the middle of it many, many times.
This is an exercise of futility. Just when you think you’re out, they pull you back in. You know what you must do.
Hell, you don’t even change into your jammy-jams. You’re in your skinny-as-shit jeans and a tight shirt – your blood is so constricted, there’s no way you’ll fall asleep the whole rest of the night. So you indulge in just another nap, brief as balls.
What’s the worse that could happen?
You snap awake again, but this time, something is very different about the room. It seems more… lively. But you feel good. Really good.
That’s because you’re well-rested, but the alarm clock on your desk now informs you that it’s 11:47 AM and you’ve got 13 minutes to make it to class.
Ah, well – sunlight makes everything more lively. And fuck you, naps.
Fuck you but good.