Earlier this year, it was announced that North Korean leader, Kim Jong Il, had become a worldwide “fashion trendsetter”. Yes, that’s right. According to a state-run newspaper, Kim Jong Il’s trademark grey jacket and matching trousers have become best sellers in fashion stores from Milan to L.A. The author of the communist party newspaper went on to claim that the “august image of the Great General, who is always wearing the modest suit while working, leaves a deep impression on people’s minds in the world.”
Perhaps his fashion has left the deepest impression with the uniformed work force, for as comedy writer Stefanie Novik comments, “He looks like a janitor.” But it is apparent that Kim’s fashion has also influenced the big screen. Just take a look at Dr. Evil.
Indeed, the dictator’s look is so versatile, it can be transformed from dressy to casual with minimal effort–whether it’s day visits with the proletariat or evening parties with Putin, Kim seems to have found the perfect wardrobe to express Communist chicness. And as we all know, grey is a color that goes with just about everything. So no need to worry about mixing and clashing with the rest of Kim’s wardrobe, which consists of equally non-clashing tones of khaki. Read more...
Its Friday! Its hot and you probably got another four to six hours before your weekend starts. Why not check out this site to kill time? My friend told me about People of Walmart and I’ve been hooked ever since. The captions they put on the pictures are hilarious, the randomness is amazing, and if only Employee of the Month Jessica Simpson was there too, it would be pure bliss. Be careful the next time you shop at Walmart. Happy Friday!
The good folks at Next Media Animation are back to tell us the story of Google’s latest woes in the way that only they can. Glad to see the devil make a return appearance. Enjoy:
So yesterday afternoon, I make plans to meet my friend Bob for coffee. Now, Bob’s a good guy—one of the nicest dudes I know—but I can’t say he’s the most attractive man. It’s not a knock on Bob ‘cause I know he’s reading this right now and he’ll be the first to tell you he was born on the dark side of ugly. He often refers to himself as an obese yeti so hopefully that’ll give you a proper mental picture you can employ while reading the rest of this blog because it’s important to understanding the events that are about to unfold.
I meet Bob in front of the coffee shop next to where a homeless man has set up camp. The homeless guy is pretty dirty and smelly and looks like he hasn’t changed his clothes in decades (his Mondale/Ferraro for President t-shirt is a tip off), but he seems harmless enough. He asks me if I can spare any change. I reply, “I’m sorry.” Then, he turns to Bob and says, “can you suck my dick?” Bob’s reply: “Uh…sorry, dude, but I’m married.”
Bob and I take a seat on the outdoor patio to enjoy our iced mochas. But then I notice a curious thing. The homeless guy is asking everyone who walks by if they could suck his dick. It doesn’t matter who they are—male or female, ugly or good-looking, straight or gay, white or black or every color in-between—he asks them all. At one point, I think he even propositions a passing dog that promptly lets out a series of barks before running off.
The good folks at Next Media Animation (NMA) in Taipei have been busy this past week with more animated versions of the top news stories of the day (see below). I have to say I’m beginning to look forward to these with as much anticipation as a kid at Christmas. Special thanks to Emily at NMA for reaching out to us and keeping us in the loop. You guys rock!
Here’s the Jet Blue flight attendant who had the meltdown:
About a year and a half ago, Arowana Films got our first featured youtube video “Kim Jong Il Eharmony“. Of course we had no idea about utilizing youtube and all its greatness but we knew we made something viral. So our good friend SuChin Pak came into town and we thought, hmmmm why not make a video with her and Kim Jong. That would hit gold! But since the whole North Korean border “confusion” happened, we had to lay low and hold off anything that could be sensitive. But now I think with the awesomeness of President Clinton, we’re ok to start our “People of Perspectives” three part series. Happy Friday!!!
Another interesting video from our Japanese friends. Maybe you’ve never given thought to the sacrifices vegetables make so that we can eat them. But as you will see, they are willing to commit ritual suicide so we can enjoy their delicious taste:
Our Taiwanese news friends are back again to break down another story for us in the way that only they can. This time the legal problems of a certain Hollywood star. Oh no, don’t drop the soap, Lindsay!
I previously blogged about 10 things overheard during the filming of the upcoming reality show set in L.A.’s Koreatown. This week, new photos of the cast of the Tyrese-produced series have surfaced and, in a related story, a new study says crimes like robbery and rape could increase in neighborhoods where reality shows are set so watch your back, Koreatown! But to commemorate this latest news, here are more things overheard during the production of the “Asian” Jersey Shore:
1. If I projectile vomit all over you, will you still sleep with me?
2. You mean Brad Pitt didn’t start his career as a gay porn star/reality show train wreck? Ah, fuuuuuck me! I wish someone had told me that sooner!
3. “My totem is a spinning soju bottle.” “OMG, mine too!” “OMG, me too!” “OMG, me too!” “OMG, what if we’re all dreaming right now?” “OMG!!!!” “OMG!!!”
No one reports the news using animated graphics better than our Taiwanese friends (click here for an example). Well, they’re at it once again, this time focusing on Sarah Palin and whether or not she’ll run in 2012. And once again, there are startling new facts in this video including Palin’s pole dancing antics and a mud wrestling match with President Obama. Who knew? See it to believe it:
The Japanese aren’t the only ones whose English-language signs lose something in the translation. Here are signs from all around Asia which obviously weren’t double-checked. Enjoy and happy weekend to all our Offenders near and far!
As I’m sure everyone’s heard by now, the new reality show set in Koreatown (a.k.a. the Asian American Jersey Shore) began filming last weekend. Not surprisingly, a photogenic, hard-partying cast has been selected including a former meth addict and a dude who’s supposedly a gay porn star or a bisexual adult model or whatever. (I’m just disappointed there doesn’t appear to be a white guy with yellow fever since the original casting call made it open to non-Asians who dug Asian shit.)
But bringing you the type of exclusives that only YOMYOMF can, here are 10 things overheard during the filming of the K-Town reality show:
1. I’m sorry but I won’t sleep with someone until at least the fourth date. By the way, did I mention that each shot of Crown you buy me counts as a date?
2. Hey guys, when we do karaoke at the norebang, can you stick to songs written before 1910? ‘Cause we don’t have the budget to clear the rights for anything more contemporary.
3. If I lick up all the soju that accidentally spilled on your crotch, do you think people will think I’m a slut?
No one is better than the Taiwanese at reporting the top news stories through animated segments that clearly and objectively get to the heart of the truth. They previously shed light on the talk show wars and the Tiger Woods mess (see both videos here). Recently, they tackled the Al Gore sex scandal (you can see that video below). And now they turn their attention to teen pop sensation Justin Bieber’s recent betrayal by…the internet.
This video seems to be chock full of new, never-before revealed info. I mean most of us already knew about the internet’s efforts to give the Bieber syphilis and send him to North Korea, but did you know the Bieber started his career as a fetus with a “mike” already in hand or that he’s a regular reader of MILF Magazine starring his own mother or that the Jonas Brothers (well, I think they’re the Jonas Brothers) recently kicked his ass? Learn all that and more here:
Asian American guys need at least one sport that they’re better at then whites, blacks, Latinos and elderly people in order to feel secure in their manhood. For awhile there, it looked like it could’ve been golf or tennis, but that didn’t work out. There’s always competitive hot dog eating, but let’s be real—“I put 50 wieners in my mouth in 12 minutes” probably won’t get you laid…by a woman (and eating too many hot dogs might drive you to do crazy shit like this). So all that’s left is ping pong. It’ll take some work, but when your man is playing ping pong, stare at him with wonder and pride as if he were playing a “real” sport like basketball and he was a “real” athlete like Michael Jordan.
2. DISSING ASIAN WOMEN
If you are a non-Asian woman and you’re with an Asian American man, at some point, he will go off on a tirade against Asian women for being traitors and sell-outs because they date white dudes and other non-Asian males. Yeah, I realize it may be confusing and hypocritical considering you’re also non-Asian and he’s Asian American yet your man has no issues with you, but trust me, it makes perfect sense to him. In these moments, don’t try to reason with or contradict him, just agree with everything he says and occasionally interject with statements like, “Yes, you’re right, Asian women are whores with white cocks permanently embedded in their mouths.” And when this topic comes up, never utter the following words to your man in any context: “The Joy Luck Club,” “Soon-Yi” or “colorblind society.”
As the ongoing World Cup 2010 in South Africa illustrates multiple times daily, few elements are capable — at least, publicly — of stirring the blood, increasing the heart rate and heightening passions more than a performance of a national anthem at the onset of an anticipated event. When done properly, in tune, and with accurate lyrics and proper phrasing intact, the song has the mystic ability to transform mere enthusiasm into singularly-focused zeal. Hair standing on the back of one’s neck, what the Hawaiian’s call “chicken skin” and eyes with moisture content of Niagara Falls are the accompanying physical contexts. You are now as ready to battle with your team as if one of Leonidas’ 300. Read more...
Here’s one kind of panda chow: Here’s another kind of panda chow:
Earlier this month, the Dahe Mincui pet park in Zhengzhou, China invited some dyed guests of honor to their opening festivities: chow dogs done up like pandas, and a golden retriever in 2010 Year Of The Tiger mode. Read more...
Yes, the incessant shrieking of tween girls and 40-year-old gay men you’re hearing in the otherwise still night air means that yet another Twilight movie is almost upon us (this time in the form of Twilight: Eclipse). I get that this franchise has a bunch of rabid fans as evidenced by all the loserspeople who camped out in downtown L.A. days before tonight’s world premiere. And I’m sure my fellow Offender Roger will once again offer an argument in support of the film to lure me to the dark side (see past efforts here and here). But I will not be moved to foresake my anti-Twilight agenda (although future installments sound like they could be perversely entertaining). I blogged last fall about the ten things I’d rather do then watch Twilight. Well, I’m back with ten additional things that are more worthy of my time:
1. Buy BP stock.
2. Go blind from spending 2 hours looking unprotected at a real eclipse (scientifically proven to be less painful then spending 2 hours watching Twilight: Eclipse).
3. Watch Twilight: Eclipse stars Kristen Stewart and Dakota Fanning in that other movie they did together this year. Yowza! Who needs pale Edward and werewolf boy? Girls rule: Read more...
I was hoping to write about the World Cup and the world’s most popular sport, but then I came across this video of a shin-kicking contest.
This is in Gloucestershire, near the home of the famous Cheese-Rolling event (where you compete with a giant round of cheese to see who can run down a steep hill the fastest). Read more...
Earlier this year, it was announced that North Korean leader, Kim Jong Il, had become a worldwide “fashion trendsetter”. Yes, that’s right. According to a state-run newspaper, Kim Jong Il’s trademark grey jacket and matching trousers have become best sellers in fashion stores from Milan to L.A. The author of the communist party newspaper went on to claim that the “august image of the Great General, who is always wearing the modest suit while working, leaves a deep impression on people’s minds in the world.”
Perhaps his fashion has left the deepest impression with the uniformed work force, for as comedy writer Stefanie Novik comments, “He looks like a janitor.” But it is apparent that Kim’s fashion has also influenced the big screen. Just take a look at Dr. Evil.
