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	<title>You Offend Me You Offend My Family &#187; How To Survive&#8230;</title>
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		<title>How to Survive Lunar New Year if You’re an Asian American Criminal</title>
		<link>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-lunar-new-year-if-you%e2%80%99re-an-asian-american-criminal/</link>
		<comments>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-lunar-new-year-if-you%e2%80%99re-an-asian-american-criminal/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 23 Jan 2012 04:58:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[An Open Letter...]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Flavah of the Week]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How To Survive...]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chinatown]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chinatown episode]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Chinese New Year]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[crime]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[criminals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[film]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hollywood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lunar new year]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tv]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/?p=83206</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Asian American Criminal: Let me start off by saying that I don’t condone your criminal lifestyle—the murdering, the thieving, the embezzling, the assaulting and all the other illegal, awful things you do. But I know you are loyal readers of this blog because…well, just look at the shit we write about. And as loyal [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-lunar-new-year-if-you%e2%80%99re-an-asian-american-criminal/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>How to Survive in a TV Writers’ Room</title>
		<link>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-in-a-tv-writers%e2%80%99-room/</link>
		<comments>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-in-a-tv-writers%e2%80%99-room/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 16 Jan 2012 21:17:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Guest Offender</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Guest Offender]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How To Survive...]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Body of Proof]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Corey Miller]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[CSI]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TV writer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Writer room]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[writers' room]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/?p=82703</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[COREY Corey Miller has been interested in the entertainment business since he was a child, much to his mother’s (and often his own) chagrin. After holding an ungodly number of Production Assistant, Production Coordinator and then Writer’s Assistant positions, he got hired as the Assistant to the Show Runner on the television show “CSI.” After [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-in-a-tv-writers%e2%80%99-room/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Photoshop Looter</title>
		<link>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/photoshop-looter/</link>
		<comments>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/photoshop-looter/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 09 Aug 2011 21:39:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Anderson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Good Thing, Bad Thing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How To Survive...]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humunahumanahumana]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lost Causes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chaos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[class tension]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[idiots]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[london riots]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[photoshop looter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stealing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[uk]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/?p=69901</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Is the above image confusing? Let me explain&#8230; The London riots this past weekend seem have simmered down a bit, with more cops on the streets, but there are still pockets around the city. The damage, physical and psychological, has truly affected citizens as class tensions become even more fiery in the UK. In fact, [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/photoshop-looter/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Summer</title>
		<link>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/summer/</link>
		<comments>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/summer/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 22 Jul 2011 10:02:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Emmie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[How To Survive...]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[for all you poor people out there suffering the humid nasty hot summer heat]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[liquid nitrogen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[portable swimming pool]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[summer]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/?p=68434</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/summer/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>9</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>How to Survive if You’re a Criminal in Gotham City</title>
		<link>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-if-you%e2%80%99re-a-criminal-in-gotham-city/</link>
		<comments>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-if-you%e2%80%99re-a-criminal-in-gotham-city/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 26 Apr 2011 07:01:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[How To Survive...]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Otaku]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Batman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bruce Wayne]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[christopher nolan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[criminal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dark Knight]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gotham City]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[joker]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[joseph gordon levitt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Marion Cotillard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Robin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[villain]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/?p=59454</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[So last week, Warner Bros. officially confirmed that Marion Cotillard and Joseph Gordon-Levitt are on board for director Chris Nolan’s third and final installment in his Batman franchise. However, early speculation that they would be playing villains Talia al Ghul and Alberto Falcone, respectively, have turned out to be false (unless Nolan pulls a switcheroo). [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-if-you%e2%80%99re-a-criminal-in-gotham-city/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>How To Survive A Phone Call From A Dead Person</title>
		<link>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-a-phone-call-from-a-dead-person/</link>
		<comments>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-a-phone-call-from-a-dead-person/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 Jul 2010 07:05:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[How To Survive...]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[call]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dead]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ghost]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[grandmother]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[phone]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/?p=31214</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Usually if I get a phone call at 7 AM, it means something is amiss. No one who knows me would call me that early because they know I probably went to bed just a couple of hours earlier and will be getting up a couple of hours later and that’s my prime sleeping time. [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-a-phone-call-from-a-dead-person/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>18</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>How To Survive If You Look Like An “Illegal” Immigrant (i.e. You’re Asian) In Arizona</title>
		<link>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-if-you-look-like-an-%e2%80%9cillegal%e2%80%9d-immigrant-i-e-you%e2%80%99re-asian-in-arizona/</link>
		<comments>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-if-you-look-like-an-%e2%80%9cillegal%e2%80%9d-immigrant-i-e-you%e2%80%99re-asian-in-arizona/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 17 May 2010 07:56:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[How To Survive...]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[arizona]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Asian]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[illegal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[immigrant]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[law]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[racist]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/?p=23652</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[As an Asian American, some of you might be thinking that Arizona’s new legislation that allows law enforcement officers to demand to see identification from anyone they “suspect” of being in the country illegally doesn’t affect you. You may be thinking this is more of a Latino issue. But the reality is if you think [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-if-you-look-like-an-%e2%80%9cillegal%e2%80%9d-immigrant-i-e-you%e2%80%99re-asian-in-arizona/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>21</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>How To Survive Valentine’s Day When Your Ass Is Flat Broke</title>
		<link>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-valentine%e2%80%99s-day-when-your-ass-is-flat-broke/</link>
		<comments>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-valentine%e2%80%99s-day-when-your-ass-is-flat-broke/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 09 Feb 2010 09:19:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Flavah of the Week]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How To Survive...]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lyme disease]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[strip club]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tick]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Valentine's Day]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/?p=12058</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A lot of people are still feeling the economic pinch. The unemployment figures are way up and it remains tough all around. The last thing anyone needs is the pressure of another holiday created by greedy corporate capitalists designed to guilt you into spending money you don’t have to buy things you don’t necessarily need. [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-valentine%e2%80%99s-day-when-your-ass-is-flat-broke/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>9</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>How To Survive Behind The Wheel Of A Speeding Car With A Jammed Accelerator</title>
		<link>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-behind-the-wheel-of-a-speeding-car-with-a-jammed-accelerator/</link>
		<comments>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-behind-the-wheel-of-a-speeding-car-with-a-jammed-accelerator/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 06 Feb 2010 09:01:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[How To Survive...]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[accelerator]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[brakes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[crash]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[recall]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Toyota]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/?p=11894</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By now, I’m sure most of our readers know about the very serious problem Toyota is experiencing. A global recall affecting 4.5 million of their vehicles is taking place because of possible faulty pedals that could become jammed causing your car to continue accelerating when you&#8217;d rather stop. While the company has reassured its customers [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-behind-the-wheel-of-a-speeding-car-with-a-jammed-accelerator/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>How To Survive An Attack By Fornicating Skunks</title>
		<link>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-an-attack-by-fornicating-skunks/</link>
		<comments>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-an-attack-by-fornicating-skunks/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 02 Feb 2010 08:53:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Flavah of the Week]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How To Survive...]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[2.3 cm penis bone]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Barry White]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[exorcist skunk]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fornicating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[skunk]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[spray]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/?p=11333</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[OK, maybe I’m exaggerating the title. I wasn’t actually attacked by fornicating skunks—they just gave me really dirty looks when I interrupted their lovemaking, but it was still a scary and angst-ridden encounter (see how I cleverly worked in our “flavah of the week” topic).  But before I go any further, you may be wondering [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com/how-to-survive-an-attack-by-fornicating-skunks/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
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