Why Japan is Awesome #3355: Kit-Kat Sandwiches

Apparently, Japanese fast food chain First Kitchen now has these on their menu:

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It’s a Kit-Kat sandwich comprised of a Kit-Kat bar, whipped cream and orange peel between two slices of white bread. And this isn’t your ordinary Kit-Kat bar, but a special “krispier” version made to be dipped into your hot beverage.

And once again, Asia has upped the fast food stakes by creating another WTF wonderful creation that puts American innovation to shame. Come on, American fast food companies, what’s up?! Where’s that good ole ingenuity and creativity? This is a start, but we can and must do better if we’re going to compete with this:

5 Asian Characters ‘Downton Abbey’ Can Work Into Its Final Season

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As you can tell from the photo above, the popular British TV series Downton Abbey isn’t the most diverse show around. But considering it’s set in the early 20th Century world of the British aristocracy and their servants, it’s hard to fault the program for being so white (aside from that one already-forgotten black recurring character from two seasons ago). However, with the recent announcement that next season will be Downton Abbey’s last, there’s still time to add a little bit of diversity with the inclusion of an Asian face or two. So to help creator/writer Julian Fellowes with this task, here are my suggestion for five Asian characters that could find their way to the Abbey:

1) CHINESE OPIUM ADDICT

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Frankly, I’m surprised the show hasn’t already used this trope—the Limehouse Chinatown district was known at that time for all sorts of illicit and immoral shenanigans and would be the perfect setting for Downton Abbey’s version of its “Chinatown episode”. Since Lady Edith continues to be the character that everyone shits on, she could run away from home because her illegitimate baby was taken away from her or Lady Mary got a pony and she didn’t or whatever slight she’s suffered that week. She finds her way to the Limehouse district where she is easily seduced by a nefarious Chinese opium addict/dealer who gets her hooked on the drug and plans to sell her as a sex slave.

The 9 Types of Asian American Actors You’ll Meet in Hollywood

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I realize the following is a question that can be asked of all actors regardless of race, but for our purposes as an “Asian American” blog: Are there “normal” and “un-neurotic” Asian American actors in Hollywood? Of course. Well, probably. I mean they have to exist, right? Just because no one’s seen Bigfoot doesn’t mean Bigfoot, doesn’t exist. As for everyone else, here’s who you’re more likely to meet…

1) THE HOBBYIST

Many Asian Americans who wish to pursue acting are afraid to do so for fear of disappointing their parents who’d prefer they pursue something more “legit” like medicine or law. So what’s a good, filial Asian to do? Pursue that legit career, of course, while doing the acting thing on the side, you know, as a hobby.

Positive traits: Since he has a secure career elsewhere, he will usually pick up the check when you go out for food or drinks.
Negative traits: Always missing auditions and rehearsals because he has to work overtime at his “real” job.
Sample dialogue: “Well, you know, Ken Jeong was a doctor while he was pursuing stand-up/acting and it worked out well for him.”
Where you’re most likely to find them: Presenting opening arguments in a divorce case at the L.A. County superior court in his “real” job as a family law attorney.

You Can Do It! (White People Edition)

Yes, white people, you can indeed do it—as this cover from the University of Georgia’s recent course catalog clearly shows:

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Way to “lead” and leave the slower blacks and women in the dust! And may I add that’s a spiffy suit you have on there.

Now don’t mind the fact that university officials have removed this image and are reprinting the catalog because some people have found this “offensive”, you know what’s up. You know what you’re capable of. So let the image inspire you because there’s clearly a visible lack of positive white male representation in our racist society. Shine on, you crazy white diamond!

Inappropriate Children’s Books?

Bored Panda is compiling some images from children’s books that they are dubbing the “weirdest”. Check out a few of them below. Not sure if “weirdest” is the best word to describe them. “Inappropriate” maybe:

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(Is it just me but does that look like an Asian brother on the receiving end of the poor pussy?)

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Thailand Bans Underboob Selfies

The Thai military government announced Monday that it would be “outlawing” the taking and posting of “underboob” selfies on social media. And what is an underboob selfie? Thank you for asking so I finally have a “valid” reason to post this pic six months after I first found it:

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For those of you who are visually-impaired, it’s a selfie that exposes the bottom part of a woman’s bosom.

According to Thai officials, they are implementing this action because the taking and posting of underboob pics is a violation of that nation’s computer crime laws that can ban any online content that does “damage to the country’s security or causes public panic” or “any obscene computer data which is accessible to the public.”

Offenders face up to five years in jail, but even officials have admitted there’s really no way to systematically arrest violators since most underboob selfies do not show the perpetrators’ faces. As in this example (which I’m only posting to illustrate the serious point I’m trying to make):

The Robot Apocalypse Will be Led by Korean Rice Cookers

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So my parents got me this new-fangled rice cooker for my birthday last month and this past weekend, I finally figured out how to use it and, damnit, if it didn’t cook up what I have to describe as the perfect batch of brown rice.

But to get there, well, I’m not ashamed to say it took a bit of effort. My previous rice cooker was simple. You added rice and water in the bowl, put it in the cooker and pressed one button to turn it on. That’s it, just one button.

But holy shit if the controls on this thing aren’t as complicated as some fancy computer thingie you’d find at NASA:

Japan’s Miss Universe Dilemma or Racism Has No Place When You’re Really, Really, Really Good-Looking

NEVER

20-year-old Eriana Miyamoto will be representing Japan in this year’s Miss Universe competition. Normally, that wouldn’t be newsworthy except that Miyamoto looks like this:

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Miyamoto is hafu aka half-Japanese (her mother is Japanese, her father is “American”) and that has raised the ire of some Japanese who feel that only someone who is “pure-blooded” Japanese should be representing the country. Even Miyamoto accepted her title half-apologetically; telling reporters that even if she doesn’t look “Japanese” on the outside, she is Japanese on the inside.

Japan is a largely homogeneous society and has a history of treating non-Japanese…well, not so good sometimes, therefore, this reaction isn’t surprising. What I’m saying to my Japanese brothers and sisters is—I get it. I get your reaction. That’s just how you are. But in this case, I think your racism is misplaced. Why? Uh, have you seen Miyamoto:

Asian American Men: The Japanese Porn Industry Needs You!

According to Shimiken, one of the top male porn stars in Japan, there is a severe shortage of men in that country’s porn industry and it’s been making his life hard difficult.

This man needs your help!

This man needs your help!

Because female porn stars far outnumber the men, Shimiken has been having to perform “overtime” and he’s been finding it hard difficult to get it keep it up. Just how bad is the situation?

As he said in a recent interview: “In this industry there are only 70 male porn stars to 10,000 women. The number of male porn stars in Japan is less than that of Bengal tigers. With 4,000 new films every month, the number of male actors simply isn’t enough. This industry is like a hole in the wall that needs to get bigger!”

Behold the Meal of All Meals

These are Dog Haus’ Tae Kwon Dogs:

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As the description says on their website, it is a hot dog that consists of “bulgogi glaze, kimchi, fried egg, Korean chili powder”.

This is how we eat at YOMYOMF. This is what we’re about—the genuine coming together of both East and West. This is indeed the culinary equivalent of different people from different cultures holding hands and singing as one.

And this is a friggin’ double burger with a hot dog, chili, cheese and onions: