Dear Zong Fuli:

I’m sure most people think you’ve got it made. After all, you are the daughter of Zong Qinghou a.k.a. the richest man in China (with a fortune worth $10 billion) and being the child of a billionaire, well, let’s just say it’s a nice position to be in. However, it’s apparently not all roses and caviar parties. As you recently told China’s Fuzhou News, you have never had a boyfriend.

As the photo above shows, you’re an attractive woman and by most accounts intelligent as well (oh, and let’s not forget that you’re the daughter of the richest man in China). So what’s the problem? It seems that the men you meet aren’t interested in you, but more in your wealth. That makes sense—being the daughter of the richest man in China, it’s got to be difficult to meet someone who’s not out to get their hands on that vast fortune.

So what’s an otherwise attractive 30-year-old billionaire looking for love supposed to do?

The answer to that question lies in the same place where you will find the answers to all of life’s difficult issues—Hollywood. In this case, one movie in particular, a classic of the cinema—1988’s Coming to America.

In the film, a young Eddie Murphy plays a prince of an African country who wants to find a bride who will love him for who he is and not because he is the prince of an African country. So he does the only thing he can do. He goes from this:

To this:

Murphy’s prince comes to America (specifically Queens, New York, because if you’re going to find a future queen, what better place than…Queens?) with his trusted valet (Arsenio Hall) and pretends to be an impoverished immigrant in order to find a bride who will love him for himself and not for his royal princehood.

So what better way to find a man who will love you for you and not your daddy’s billions than to come to America, pretend that you are an impoverished immigrant and find the true love you seek?

And if you take this advice and decide to come L.A. (a.k.a. City of the Angels–what better place to find a guy who’s…angelic?), please note that I have always been particularly fond of impoverished immigrants and the fact that you will inherit billions means nothing to me. Because I can tell just by looking at your picture and reading your words that you have a unique and beautiful soul and the “daughter of the richest man in China” thing doesn’t define who you are. And I understand that. I get that. Yup, that’s the ticket…