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I’ve been known to dismiss Barbie as a harmful symbol of everything that’s wrong about our culture and the way we market “unrealistic” images of womanhood to little girls, but even I have to admit this is pretty damn awesome!
Meet Zombie Attack Barbie (with Zombie Ken):
This would make the perfect holiday gift for that young, impressionable girl in your life. Unfortunately, there’s one, little problem…Zombie Attack Barbie doesn’t technically exist.
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I first heard of Roger Garcia, a pioneer champion of Asian American films, when I was an intern at Visual Communications in 1988. Finally, in the last decade or so, I’ve started meeting him at various film festivals all over the world. Roger and his wife Lydia Tanji began stationing in Hong Kong after his appointment last year as the executive director of the Hong Kong International Film Festival, the largest festival player in the region. Returning to Hong Kong, I touched base with Roger who warmly invited me to dinner at a tucked away Izakaya in Wanchai, the neighborhood where I grew up as a kid. It was also my first time hanging out with Lydia though we met briefly at the Hawaii International Film Festival a couple years back.
Having stayed in Hong Kong for a few days, I was mostly catching up with friends and family and was desperately seeking some kind of inspiration for a story or a blog with little luck. On top of that, my Macbook was acting up and I had to go to the most dreaded Genius Bar that usually came up with little solution other than replacing the entire computer. Meeting Roger and Lydia definitely changed my luck as I was immediately inspired talking to them about the state of Asian American filmmaking over sake, beer and tasty skewers of meat and vegetables.
Our friends at KoreAm Magazine are honoring my fellow Offender Sung Kang (a.k.a Han from Fast and Furious: Tokyo Drift) at their annual Unforgettable Gala Fundraiser this Saturday night in Los Angeles. Unfortunately, I won’t be in attendance as I will be in New York with my other fellow Offenders Justin and Elaine so I thought I could pay an early tribute to Sung and talk about why I think he deserves to be honored.
I’m currently sitting at an outdoor coffee place, in between meetings, and figure this is as good a time as any to write a few words in memory honor of Mr. Sung Kang. Let’s see…what I can I say about him…hmm…OK, let’s start by simply letting people know who Sung is:
Sung Kang is an Asian American actor.
That’s good. Start simply. Save the meaty stuff for later. Let’s see, what can I say next…Wow, not to get off-topic, but it’s really a beautiful day. It’s hard to believe it’s almost December when it’s sunny and 75 degrees out. Seems a shame that I’m sitting at a coffee shop on my computer when I should be out enjoying a day like this. But…sorry, getting off track here. I need to focus and write something awesome about Sung. So what do I have so far?
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Now this is more like it. Check out this geektastic dual piano rendition of JUST LIKE HONEY by The Jesus and Mary Chain. These kids are so adorable, especially the girl, who I would’ve crushed on back in high school. Let’s hope they do more piano covers of ’80s alternative rock bands!
(Via Boing Boing)
Over at the blog Cracked Two, there are some very cool photos of old structures that were built in former Yugoslavia in the ’60s and ’70s. Commissioned by former President Josip Broz Tito, these super structures were built at sites where great injustice took place during WWII, ranging from internment camps, to massacres, etc. Designed by various sculptors and architects, they were made to represent the great might of the Social Republic. In the 1980s, these monuments attracted millions of visitors per year, especially young pioneers for their “patriotic education.” After the Republic dissolved in early 1990s, they were completely abandoned, and their symbolic meanings were forever lost.
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In defense of Oneal Ron Morris, the transgendered Florida woman charged with practicing medicine without a license for injecting a concoction of cement, mineral oil and flat tire sealant into another woman’s butt – she did it to herself first.
And the results speak for themselves.
Given the staggering budonkadonk Morris is sporting, the real question is not, why would she inject toxic junk into other people’s trunks, but why wouldn’t she?
And she did it for only $700. Seven hundred bucks. You can’t buy a new washer/dryer for $700, let alone a new backside. Yes, it’s true, to keep costs down, you may have to turn to some creative protocols like performing the surgery in your own home, and using a garden hose to pump the esteem-boosting ooze into someone’s ass, but still, for seven hundred bucks? What do you spend on lattes in a month?
Does this strike up any flashbacks to Chinese school for any of you ABCs out there? Either way, this nostalgic take is a collaboration between The Shanghai Restoration Project and Yip’s Children’s Choir, bringing Chinese electronica music to the masses. Entitled Little Dragon Tales, the CD of electronically enhanced Chinese children songs is being released today on iTunes and Amazon. Great stocking stuffers!!
I’ve often extolled the virtues of semen when it comes to its health benefits, but even I have to admit this is a bit too much:
Yup, it’s the Natural Harvest Cookbook, which is allegedly filled with 61-pages of semen-based recipes like this:
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An expert (my stoner friend) was explaining to me his theory about the pendulum swing. He explains the last time we’ve had these kinds of demonstrations and people expressing the unfairness was back in the 60’s. And back then, the protests became so big and effective enough, there was change and progress. But it was only a quick fix to alleviate the chaos and over time things swung back to be more conservative and then finally more authoritarian. So are these demonstrations starting with Occupy Wall Street powerful enough to be effective? I haven’t heard Obama or anyone from the government acknowledge any of these movements. Do people like you and me even feel like its worth taking part of any demonstrations especially since the law enforcement are more likely to take shooting practice with their rubber bullets and pepper spray? Or should we be out there, arms locked, and fighting against social and economic inequality?
As technology improves and evolves, we get more and more things we find we can never live without. Bathrooms. Motor carriages. Computers.
And though we are in the nascent period of our dependency on it, it’s still nonetheless easy to add one more thing to our list: online dating.
But like all those other wondrous advancements, along with it comes its own set of pitfalls, born of its unique place and purpose.
One such problem? The unfortunate fact that most photos are two-dimensional and some people – well, some people just look better staying that way. This leads to some optical illusions, so to speak, ones that may mislead your pants.
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Up until now, scientists had believed that the first domesticated dogs originated in the Middle East between 9,000-30,000 years ago. But in another instance of I-guess-scientists-really-don’t-know-anything-so-I’m-going-to-continue-believing-that-pizza-is-a-vegetable-and-the-pinnacle-of-healthy-nutritiousness, a Swedish scientist has found strong, if not conclusive, proof that the ancestors of all currently domesticated dogs actually came from a region of China just south of the Yangtze River.
How did these Swedish eggheads figure this out? I have no idea ‘cause the article explaining this is really boooooorrrring, but you can read for yourself here.
The more pertinent question is—why am I blogging about this? Is it to counter the stereotype that Asians eat dogs by showing that, no, we loved them enough to make them our best friend? No, frankly I don’t give a fuck about that. Is it to demonstrate that I love dogs and therefore all animals, which I know is a turn-on for some women? Not really, but if you’re a hot chick who gets turned on by a sensitive man who has a soft spot for our canine friends or someone who can fake that sensitivity really well if it means getting laid, please email me your phone number. But, nope, the real reason I’m blogging about this is so I can do one thing and one thing only…
I'm not naughty, I'm a proper girl!
Here it is, Thanksgiving weekend! I’m going to impress my man’s family! Oh yes I am! I am armed with my best green beans recipe and the secret to a Brown Betty crust that is to-die-for! I will be humorous and gracious! I will not talk about sex or politics or religion! I’m dressed in my Thanksgiving best! (Argle sweater with dark jeans: tasteful and casual, check!) I’m driving down the I-5 freeway from San Francisco to Los Angeles singing the Dixie Chicks “Landslide”at full volume! 5 1/2 hours til first impression made!
It’s dark. I like to drive long distances at night cuz I can hit 85 mph without fear of the dreaded CA Highway Patrol. (It’s when you hit 90 mph they become suspicious!)
I am lying on a friend’s couch, somewhere in Los Angeles. At least, I think she’s my friend. I don’t really remember my name, but then again, it doesn’t matter, does it? There were plenty of people there, sprawled out in the expanses of that line – that line that begged the existence of a god.
No one remembered their names, for their families and their friends were lost in the aisles, nooks and crannies of that wretched Best Buy themselves. Different places, same fate.
What can I recall? I recall deliriously low prices on games and CD’s, yes – but for me, my poison was movies and the Blu-Rays were price-slashed to bits. They were tempting me, tempting all of us, beckoning to our coffers through our brains.
“Yes, come on – save some money. Save some money, yeah – right there!”
1 Comment on The Aftermath: From the Trenches of Black Friday 2011.
What do the 1963 Corvette Stingray, Mako Shark I and II, the Boss 302 and 429 Mustangs, Jeep Grand Cherokee, the Corvair Super Spyder and even the Goodyear Blimp have in common? They were all the creations of Japanese American automobile designer Lawrence (Larry) Shinoda.
Born in 1930 in Los Angeles, Shinoda was interned with his family at Manzanar during World War II. Later, he built hot rods and became involved in the then-burgeoning drag race culture in Southern California. In 1955, he won the first National Hot Rod Association Nationals.
Thus, began a life-long affair with cars and positions at Ford, Packard and GM—ultimately leading to his work on concept cars that would give birth to the 1963 Corvette Sting Ray, which would secure Shinoda’s reputation as one of the most innovative automobile designers in the business.
If you’re not already following us on Facebook, Twitter and our new Tumblr, you’re missing out on a lot of extras you won’t find here on our blog including updates on various Offender-related projects (like the most recent updates about our upcoming YOMYOMF Network on YouTube) and silly, fun things like “Add Your Own Caption.” This is where we post an image we find online or that our readers forward to us and ask you to write an appropriate caption to accompany that image. And we’ll feature the best captions here.
And the “best” caption for this week comes from reader Shannon Wong:
you SAID "Let's eat out"!
So check out our Facebook page for future editions of “Add Your Own Caption”: write your own caption and/or “like” the ones you think are worthy and we may share them here.
My eleven year old son Gabriel has a vivid imagination.
A little too vivid.
For the last four nights, my wife and I have taken turns lying in bed with him until he falls asleep. The first night, after he had gone to bed, my wife and I, and his older brother Rafael, were still up, watching TV. We heard Gabriel coming down the stairs and thought he was going to the bathroom. Instead he stood at the doorway to the den, looking at us.
“What’s wrong, Gabriel?”
“Honey, you look tired, go back to bed.”
He said he wasn’t sleepy. We pressed a little further – “you have school tomorrow, Gabriel,” “It’s way past your bedtime,” – until he finally said,
…Addams Family style. I love that the weirdos, nerds and Asian kids are the Indians exacting revenge on Sarah Miller and her pilgrims.
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone.
Remember being a kid? No? Then you’re probably old enough to appreciate this.
Growing up and being shoved vegetables in my face always seemed like it would be the least pleasant experience I’d ever go through from the perspective of prepubescent, sixteen-year-old me. I always dreamed of an escape from the dinner table and that sort of culinary water boarding.
I always dreamed of a land with candy cane lampposts and gum drop buttons. I drooled at the idea of whole day’s meals composed only of sugar and sweets. Little did I know that land of lore was no lie – it was very real.
And its name is the Craft Service table.
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My filmmaker friend Ringo and I just came back from a screening of Luc Besson’s latest opus The Lady with Michelle Yeoh and David Thewlis and we got into a heated debate about the movie and essentially the beauty of cinema and representing Asia. I was quite excited about the screening as I love Luc Besson, Michelle Yeoh and David Thewlis… but sitting through the 127 minutes movie about the story of pro-democracy activist Aung San Suu Kyi and her professor husband Michael Aris proved slightly underwhelming.
“But you gotta give it credit that it’s an Asian movie trying to be an Oscar contender,” said Ringo. “I like the movie because it’s really trying to tell an untold Asian story to the global audience.”
In Part I, I described the prep work my producer and I went through for a pitch we were taking around town for an adaptation of a Young Adult novel. Now it was time to go off on “the dog and pony show,” as my agent once affectionately described it.
It’s always best to arrive earlier than later, so for our first pitch, the producer and I decide to meet 20 minutes early. We go over last minute notes, how we’re going to intro, etc. We finally get called in 15 minutes after our scheduled appointment.
