You are currently browsing the archives for May 2011.

DC Universe to be rebooted again

  • May 31, 2011 4:48 pm

Some major news came out today in the comic book world. Chief creative officers and co-publishers Geoff Johns and Jim Lee announced that the DC Universe will be rebooted, with new editions reverting back to issue #1. The first book to be released is Justice League of America, bringing back the classic team comprised of Superman, Batman, Green Lantern, Wonder Woman, The Flash, and Aquaman (the drawing above is a sneak peek of the rebooted team by Jim Lee). From  USA Today:

(Geoff) Johns promises a focus on the interpersonal relationships within DC’s trademark superteam. “What’s the human aspect behind all these costumes?” he says. “That’s what I wanted to explore.

Mind If I Borrow Your Nostalgia?

  • May 31, 2011 4:22 am

I can’t tell you how excited I was to find this sitting on a shelf at my local Safeway:

In that instant I was transported back to the summer of 1965.  I was a grad student living in Berkeley, and just the year before, 10,000 of us had spontaneously surrounded a police car which had driven on to campus to arrest political activist Jack Weinberg.  I kicked a cop in the shin, was arrested, detained, but in the end, we prevailed.

The Free Speech movement was born, civil rights were in the air, and I was making the political very personal by dating Odessa, a gorgeous young black activist whose older sister had taken part in the Freedom Rides of 1961 (Odessa’s sense of style, by the way, made Betty Draper look like a frumpy housewife).

Everyone Prematurely Ejaculates

  • May 31, 2011 12:01 am

Priligy, the new premature ejaculation pill, was released earlier this month in Singapore and has completely sold out. Perhaps not surprising when you consider that premature ejaculation has become the most common male sex health problem globally and one in three men in Singapore is said to suffer from it.

Now, I just have one thing to say on this subject: Why do people automatically think premature ejaculation is a bad thing?

‘Cause ladies, if you’re with a man and he shoots his load prematurely, it means that you are so incredibly sexy and beautiful that he just can’t help but explode. How is that bad? You should feel flattered that he jizzes faster than Carl Lewis ran the 100m. So what if it means you’ll be left “unsatisfied?” Let’s be honest, even if your man goes the distance, it’s highly unlikely you’ll be satisfied anyway. You’re just going to pull out that Hello Kitty vibrator from under your bed the moment he goes to the bathroom or falls asleep and finish “properly.”

What Does a Flag at Half Mast Mean?

  • May 30, 2011 12:59 pm

Today is a day of remembrance of all the fallen soldiers who sacrificed their lives for this country’s freedom. A symbol of that freedom is always reminded by looking at the American flag. It might not have meant much when I was younger other than a morning right-hand-over-heart pledge of allegiance. But serving in the military for six years, traveling to other countries and seeing the difference between America and other countries, I realized how fortunate we have it here. I remember one of the stressful but satisfying ceremonies to perform on the ship is raising and lower the flag. Most people probably will notice all the American flags at half staff (or half mast if you are on a ship) today. As a sailor, I always wondered what it meant. I knew the country would fly it at half mast on a holiday like today or a day like for the Pearl Harbor attack. Even when a worldwide disaster happens like the tsunami or even a national massacre such as Virgina Tech, we will fly our flag at half mast for respect for the lost. But what does it really mean? Lemme explain more and how to properly raise and lower a flag.

The Unseen Enemy

  • May 30, 2011 10:33 am

On this solemn day when we pay respects to those who have sacrificed their lives for our cherished freedoms, let us not forget those who have bravely surmounted that other grave challenge to our way of life:  the unseasonal stomach flu.

It began Wednesday.  My wife Linda complained of indigestion after dinner.  An hour later I was handing her our large plastic yellow popcorn bowl and supplying her with a folded, damp wash cloth for her forehead. By her count, it was seven solid retchings.

On Thursday our ten year old Gabriel had turned ashen and sweaty, and was puking his guts out.

The ‘Chinglish’ Journal: Week 2 (May 30, 2011)

  • May 30, 2011 12:02 am

DHH

Tony Award-winning playwright David Henry Hwang (M. BUTTERFLY) is in rehearsals for his latest play CHINGLISH in Chicago where it will have its world premiere at the historic Goodman Theater from June 18-July 24. DHH has graciously agreed to blog regularly throughout the rehearsal process to give our readers a glimpse into how a major theatrical production comes to life.

We’ve completed our second week of rehearsals, and things still seem to be going remarkably well. Leigh (the show’s director) keeps the rehearsal room humming with her energy, insights, and sense of humor. Our actors are digging into the script, making discoveries, and deepening their characterizations. Surprisingly, they’re all easy to work with – not a prima donna in the bunch.

As the playwright, my job in rehearsals is to provide insight into the play when appropriate, but, most importantly, to continue rewriting and fine-tuning the script. Unlike some writers, I don’t like to follow along in the text as the actors run scenes. I believe playwriting is sort of like writing music, where the notes on the staff are less important than how they sound in the air. Therefore, a part of me couldn’t care less about the words on the page. Because we’re not publishing a book, here, we’re putting on a show, and the audience isn’t going to be looking at my script, they’re going to be watching and listening to what’s happening onstage.

So I do the same: watch the actors, and listen to the scenes. I’m constantly on the lookout for stuff that feels false, forced, overwritten, cheesy – moments which neither illuminate character nor move the plot forward. When that happens, I get a bad feeling — I grow bored, or slightly nauseous.

STUCK IN MY BRAIN: “1000 Words” from Final Fantasy X-2.

  • May 30, 2011 12:00 am

I used to be a huge video game nerd (HUGE because I was kind of fat once), but this is a vice I’ve now, by and large, given up.

RPGs at one point were my bread and butter and while I wasn’t hipster enough for the Dragon Quest series, Final Fantasy was definitely my poison.  Again, I wasn’t hardcore enough to have started this at an early, early age – when my diet was mostly Mega Man X and first party Nintendo games – but I did get in when most of my generation did, with Final Fantasy VII.

Oddly enough, though my RPG journey took me all the way through Final Fantasy X, I didn’t bother taking the plunge into Square’s (or was it Square-Enix then already?) first direct Final Fantasy sequel, Final Fantasy X-2.

Now, the main thing you need to know about X and X-2 is that the latter features a lot more singing because the protagonist is now also a pop singer…?  Fuck, I don’t know – you can’t expect me to research this can you?

Well, here’s the Main Theme for the game, which, coincidentally, is now ringing in my brain incessantly:

This is a song I have quite a history with, if one anecdote can constitute “quite a history.”  In my mid-teens, I was obsessed with video game scores and my music library traces my musical interests all the way back to their inception.

Pictures of Things that Look Like a Penis

  • May 29, 2011 9:00 pm

Do I really need to explain any further than the title already does? It’s a long holiday weekend, just enjoy:

Be part of the 10 million views!!!

  • May 29, 2011 10:20 am

I can’t help it. I love this video.
It makes me religious, it’s that sweet.

Happy Memorial Weekend everyone!
YouTube Preview Image

The Command and Control Strategy

  • May 28, 2011 9:03 pm

Welcome back to “The 33 Strategies of War” by Robert Greene, as seen through the hidden lessons of sports. Last week, we digested The Death Ground Strategy, finishing our first course, “Self-Directed Warfare”.

Now, let us begin the second course, “Organizational Team Warfare”, the first dish being…

THE COMMAND AND CONTROL STRATEGY

Unless you live in a cave, you know this situation well. You’ve been hired to complete an important project. You recruit a group of creative people. Everyone has ideas they want to contribute, including your investors, reducing your brilliant plans to rubble. The project ends up okay, but you know it could have been amazing shit had they followed your vision. Too many egos. Too many ideas. There’s a saying in sports. There’s only one ball to go around.

WHAT I LEARNED ON YOMYOMF THIS WEEK – MAY 21 – 27, 2011

  • May 28, 2011 12:00 am

What I Learned on YOMYOMF This Week is a capsule of the week’s blogs with sarcastic commentary from Yours Truly (that’s me!).  If you’ve been busy and missed out on a couple of our daily gems, this is a perfect way to catch up.

But seriously – what was more important than reading YOMYOMF?

As May winds down, our articulate bloggers tackle double-entendres; sexual positions as food pricing; and Totoro.

Yeah, I know you came here for the Totoro, you sick fuck.

WEEKEND AWESOMENESS: BUDWEISER NUN CHUCKS:

“If no Rapture happens today, it’s because Jesus got a hold of one of these and was too pre-occupied testing them out to remember the Apocalypse.”

It’s a tossup between that and the possibility that He finally microwaved a burrito so hot even He couldn’t touch it.

SAF SEEKING…. FOOT IN MOUTH DISEASE:

“A small crowd of gatherers and his old climbing buddies were circled around him since apparently, being a sausage king is news that travels fast.”

“Sausage King” sounds like some Urban Dictionary term.  It wouldn’t surprise me.

EDIT: Surprise me sometime, Internet.

The Drug of Ink Smell and Paper

  • May 27, 2011 7:37 pm

I am a big fan of Gerhard Steidl. An international publisher of many of the most significant photo and art books, his contribution to publishing, and the art and design world is beyond great. He is a visionary craftsman, who personally oversees the production of each book, from conception to final product. He has expanded to non-fiction and literature, but his dabbling into more populist fare allows him to fund some of his more personal projects. Bottom-line, he is a true artist, who fights the good fight when it comes to the importance of books; the need for tactile connections with a tome, as well as the smell of ink and the feel of paper, which are qualities that vary for each book, providing a unique DNA for every tome or edition he publishes. In a world of Kindles and iPads, this is very refreshing.

The Other Side of Festival de Cannes (Part Deux)

  • May 27, 2011 4:39 pm

Is there no French word for LE HANGOVER?

In my last blog post, I reported on the more mainstream side of the Cannes Film Festival — hotly anticipated art house fare like THE TREE OF LIFE, MELANCHOLIA, THE ARTIST, as well as more of the glitz and glamor of the world’s most important film festival. But there’s a darker side to Cannes, the Marche Du Film, a film bazaar where companies, producers, agents, and representatives hawk their films, hoping to strike deals. This is really where the fun is at Cannes, because you see films of all shapes, sizes, budgets, and quality, and usually, they’re pretty genre-oriented.

The general rule of thumb is that sex, violence, nudity, and gore transcends all boundaries, and although this year was a “buying spree” for American distributors, the films that sell tend to be of the Z-grade variety, because a) they’re cheap and b), um… they’re cheap. On the flip side, there were also a lot of high quality genre films with great production values, and shows the globalization of moviemaking as foreign films compete and stand on their own, against bigger Hollywood fare (see: South Korea). So, in this blog entry, I’m going to highlight some of the more unique fare that inhabited this year’s Cannes. Although there wasn’t a film as magnificently cheesy like NUDE NUNS WITH BIG GUNS from last year (it’s rare to capture lightning in a bottle), it was still a pretty good year for schlock and genre cinema. Here are some highlights:

3D SEX AND ZEN: EXTREME ECSTASY: I’ve been badgered by Offender Phil for my review on this film. The market screening I went to was packed, full of horny buyers ready to sink their teeth (and wallets) in what is being advertised as Hong Kong’s first 3D porn film.

How Important Are Grades?

  • May 27, 2011 3:41 am

My dear friend Travis invited me to his home for dinner the other night (excellent homemade turkey tacos by the way, with hand fried shells), and there I got to visit with his daughter Maggie, 13, who I’ve known since birth.  I am her godfather, and I have been tight with Travis since seventh grade.

Since seventh grade.  In other words, his daughter is now older than Travis and I were when we met.  If the word “scary” didn’t just pop into your head, you’re still in your twenties.

Maggie just applied to four private high schools – and was accepted by all of them.  All of them.  She’s getting straight A’s and plays on a competitive volleyball team that travels throughout the western states.

Totoro

  • May 27, 2011 1:28 am

Debunking 5 Hollywood Stereotypes about White People

  • May 27, 2011 12:01 am

Here at YOMYOMF, we’ve often written about stereotypes concerning Asians and other minorities. Since most of us work in the entertainment industry, we’ve especially been interested in the stereotypes perpetuated by Hollywood. And oftentimes, we’ve debunked them by using sound and irrefutable arguments like the “Because I said so” defense or the “If You Disagree with me, You’re a Racist” methodology.

But while shattering stereotypes of minorities is good and all, I realized I’ve forgotten about the white people. Yes, they may hold a disproportionate amount of power and wealth in America, but that doesn’t mean that Hollywood doesn’t unfairly stereotype them too. So to support my white brothers and sisters, I will examine 5 stereotypes of white people perpetuated by Hollywood and expose them for the lies they are.

1) 80-YEAR-OLD WHITE GRANDMOTHERS LOVE TO RAP AT WEDDING RECEPTIONS

Having grown up without attending any white people weddings, I’m ashamed to admit I completely bought into this stereotype. So when I finally went to the wedding of two white friends, I most looked forward to the reception when I would finally get to witness an elderly grandmother pick up the mike and bust out some “Rapper’s Delight” or “Fuck Tha Police” live.

The Most Important Thing I Ever Learned About Writing

  • May 26, 2011 12:01 am

“People chase illusions and these illusions are created by movies. I want to make things concrete and real and to break down the illusion. There’s nothing more ironic or strange or contradictory than life itself. I don’t want people years from now to say: ‘Remember DeNiro, he had real style.’”
– Robert DeNiro

There are far more qualified people than me to give advice about writing, including two of my fellow Offenders—Alfredo, who won the prestigious Nicholls Fellowship, and Iris, who was nominated for an Academy Award for writing Clint Eastwood’s Letters From Iwo Jima (see an example of how good Iris’ advice is here). But when I moved to New York at age 17 to pursue the writer’s life, there was one thing I learned about dramatic writing that’s stayed with me to this day and that I think of every time I write. Actually, it’s a lesson that also applies to the other dramatic arts—acting and directing (more on these below)—as well.

It has nothing to do with anything I learned in class (although my writing profs at New York University were awesome), but rather an article I read during that time that made a light bulb in my head go off.

I think the piece was in the Village Voice or New York Times Magazine–it was an interview with a father who flew up to New York City every weekend from his Florida home to try to find his son who had run away as a teen. A family friend had allegedly seen the boy in New York so that was enough for this father to travel to the city every Friday night to walk around Manhattan from top to bottom, left to right, and then fly back to Florida on Sunday night. The father did this because he loved his son and as long as there was a shred of hope the boy was alive, he was going to use all his resources to find him. This is what he lived for. He did this every weekend for almost a decade. In his dreams, the father imagined finding his son, having an emotional reunion, bringing him back to Florida where the boy’s mother was waiting and they’d be a family again.

It’s okay to say “Bitch.” Bitch.

  • May 26, 2011 12:00 am

Yes, in case you didn’t get the memo, the word ‘bitch’ will no longer incense the masses and fill them with righteous indignation.

I was watching the trailer for the upcoming movie Horrible Bosses – a green band trailer, mind you – and at one point, one of the characters exclaims, “Let’s kill this bitch!”

It’s not the first time I’ve noticed this tide change in decency standards, but it was the first time since I started writing for YOMYOMF that I remembered and I have to write about something today.

But yeah – interesting.  I remember growing up that my mother would ground me for saying “Rats!” as an interjection.

I had read it off a Peanuts comic and it got me a yelling.  So did “Good grief” and “What the-”, the latter being me intentionally leaving out the most heinous of words, “hell.” Despite such deliberation and careful treading, I was still reprimanded.

The World of Fujiko Fujio

  • May 25, 2011 12:05 am

When I was growing up, I was not a Disney kid. I did remember my parents bringing me to watch Snow White and Sleeping Beauty in the theaters. I thought they were fun to look at as movies but didn’t think too much about them after. What captured my heart and imagination were the comics and animation by the Japanese duo creators team Fujiko Fujio who created Doraemon, the robot cat character, that became my world as well as that of many other Asian kids. It’s really a pity that Doraemon hasn’t yet crossed over to the Western world… and perhaps it’s because Fujio’s properties so perfectly reflect the Asian middle class and its culture. Doraemon is without doubt one of the most successful comic properties out of Japan.

Doraemon is the name of the comic series and also the name of the titular character, the robot cat that was sent from the future by the protagonist Nobita’s great great grandson to help Nobita out in the present so that his future could improve. The concept itself is incredibly brilliant, and might have inspired James Cameron who wrote a certain film about the killer robot who was sent back in time to terminate the future leader of the revolution—the exact antithesis to Doraemon.

YOMYOMF Investigates: Why are McDonalds’ New Peach Pies 69 Cents?

  • May 25, 2011 12:01 am

Let me make something crystal clear—I love McDonalds’ pies. I grew up on their apple and cherry pies. They’re the ultimate cheap, comfort food snack (an apple pie is still only 50 cents). So it’s unfortunate that here in the continental United States, we don’t get the cool varieties of pies that are available at other McDonalds locations.

Like China’s Sweet Taro and Banana Pies:

Or Thailand’s Broccoli and Cheese Pie:

We do occasionally get a new pie, but even then it’s problematic. Like the elusive holiday pie that only seems to be available on that one day around Christmas when I can’t eat solid foods ‘cause I’ve had my wisdom tooth pulled:

But all this changed when I walked into a McDonalds on Sunday to purchase a cup of McCoffee and there staring back at me from the overhead menu was this:

The new peach pie. Available for a limited time for only 69 cents.